This Mess is Gonna Get Raw Like Sushi

Time Management

2008-11-18T20:41:00.003-05:00

I've been gone awhile. Again. Sorry 'bout that. It's been nutty, and to be honest, I've had other outlets *cough* facebook *cough*

Tonight I devoted quite a bit of energy to answering Kate's question of what we struggle with most in managing our time, and how our days go. I thought I might as well stick it up here and ask you all the same - what do you do? I clearly need to make a few adjustments. On December 15th I start a new job with a much more fixed schedule. We're also going to be moving sometime soon, where I'll have more control over my environment than I have now...obviously a fantastic opportunity to make some big changes! Here's how a typical day goes for me now, and I ask you to tell me what you do, also. Additionally...I'm giving y'all the opportunity to give me some sage advice! Yeah, there's a lot of obvious things I know I need to do differently. Maybe going to bed earlier...folding my clothes right away...gah. I'm a wreck. See for yo'selves...

++++

7:00 - Alarm starts going off and I hit snooze compulsively.

7:45/8:00-ish - Haul self out of bed. Give self pep talk for shower. Take shower. Run upstairs to throw clean but wrinkled clothes in dryer with a wet washcloth...because let's face it, I'm terrible about putting away clean clothes, if I even get them out of the dryer in a timely manner.

8:50 - Rush out of house without breakfast or coffee in desperate attempt to get somewhere by 9:00

9:10 - Arrive at office or client's house. Apologize to client for being late. Client is very accustomed to this.

10:15-7:00 - Drive from client to client, save the world at each domicile, with random interspersed periods spent errand-running, unhealthy lunch-eating, Kate and Rylie lunch dates, and compulsive facebook-checking. Sporadic paperwork productivity.

7:30-ish - Arrive home. Eat whatever Josh's mom made for dinner. Lament that I'm not eating Indian food or lime pepper tilapia cooked in my own kitchen. Yearn for day we have our own place again.

8:00-12:00 - Randomly surf internet, watch Jon & Kate Plus 8 episodes, have Josh and Laura time, generally disregard any necessary prep work for following morning, feel constantly guilty that I'm not doing paperwork.

12:00 - Finally get into bed, read 2 pages of one of five books I'm trying to get through, and fall asleep much too late.

++++

Yes, I think I'm ready for a new job with a 10:00 bedtime. And maybe a life coach. Bring it. But be gentle and/or snarky, because clearly I've just laid bare a very open wound (and I like it when you're snarky).

Well-Traveled

2008-08-23T05:45:00.002-04:00

Friends, hello. I'll be brief, because let's face it, I didn't come to Europe to do the things I do at home (i.e. spend too much time on the Internet). Just here to give a quick update and post a few photos.

We had layovers in Chicago and Dusseldorf. I slept for most of our stay in the Dusseldorf airport (where the woman who came over the PA had a very seductive German voice...bordering on inappropriate, methinks) and the subsequent flight to London. First, can I just say....I LOVE LOVE LOVE London. Two days was not enough - I did not want to leave at all. Josh has, at times, mentioned the idea of getting a job in London after he finishes school (I don't recall for what purpose); I was hesitant before, but I'm all about it now. Yes, Josh, let's get a ridiculously overpriced flat in Kensington/Southwark/Notting Hill and furnish it entirely from Ikea...you can get a work visa and I'll stay in our flat and have a baby or two. As soon as the kids have British accents, we can go. Aren't I silly? I love this little fantasy, though. Time will tell, no?

Caught the Eurostar to Paris...whilst in the Chunnel I marveled that somebody figured out how to build a train tunnel under the freakin' English Channel. Really? And so many years ago? How does that even happen?

In Paris, I was very anxious about pickpockets - Josh later lamented over-warning us about it. It was more of a challenge, not knowing much French and having the sense that they're not all that crazy about us. But you look around, and you think, "Come on, French! We've done a lot for each other over the years! French and Indian War? WWII? Statue of Liberty? C'mon, let's be friends again!" Nobody was rude to us, but there was certainly a note of impatience at some places. Saw some beautiful things and woke up an hour after checkout time at the hotel. Oops!

Now we're in Heidelberg, Germany, staying with Josh's cousin Joel and his family. It's been so relaxing having more space in a house with home-cooked food and a hospitable family. We're setting out today, hopefully hit up an H&M for some cheap clothing basics (Josh forgot his hoodie and one of my bra straps mysteriously shredded to nothing...hmmm), and I'm told we're having some cheap, fantastic Indian for lunch. Here's a few photos, compliments of Elizabeth...because Laura made a couple of tragic mistakes. First, I forgot the USB cable for my camera. Second, I accidentally deleted ALL my photos the second morning in Paris while trying to delete just one. I had a little meltdown on the Tube platform, but I'm over it. So here you go -

Okay, we're rushing off and it wasn't going well, so I'll come back to that later. Cheers, mates! Guten Tag!

Executioner of the Flies

2008-08-10T20:50:00.003-04:00

I know we're all dealing with fruit flies right now...if you feel alone, don't. We've all got 'em this time of year. I found this idea on about.com...I set up my trap about an hour ago and there's probably 10 dead fruit flies in the bottom with another eight chillin' out on top of the saran wrap, hopefully well on their way to a vinegary death. And here, friends, I share this wisdom with you. Vinegar is the most amazing thing, seriously!

Battling a swarm of fruit flies in your kitchen or bathroom? Get rid of them quickly with this simple, homemade trap:

What You Need:

Apple cider vinegar
Dish soap
A jar or small bowl
Plastic wrap

What You Do:

1. Pour a cup of apple cider vinegar into a jar or small bowl.

2. Add a couple drops of dish soap to the jar.

3. Cover the container with plastic wrap, and poke a few small holes in the wrap.

4. Place in the area where you've seen the fruit flies, and wait for the trap to do its job.

Why This Works:

Fruit flies are attracted to the smell of the vinegar, and will attempt to land on its surface. However, they're in for a surpise – since the dish soap breaks the surface tension of the vinegar, the fruit flies fall in and drown. Say good-bye to that annoying swarm!

Benefits of Using Vinegar:

no harsh fumes
inexpensive
environmentally-friendly

Tips and Warnings:

1) Keep out of the reach of children

2) A bottle with a small neck can also be used. (Plastic wrap isn't necessary, if you use this approach)

RIP

2008-07-03T12:32:00.002-04:00

Yesterday, God saw fit to bless us and dropped a tree on Josh's car.

Yeah, I know, normally this is a bad thing...but when both your cars are limping along AND have full coverage...WOOHOO! I'm currently waiting for Mr. Progressive Man to show up, tell us he is indeed going to total it, and hand me a check. Down payment, baby.

Please note the tan steering column in the blue car. Yep. That's classy.

Please, I implore you...

2008-06-30T23:06:00.002-04:00

...if you want me to quit whining about apostrophes so much, read this and spread the word. If we could get this into the hands of whomever runs "Cheer's" restaurant on Plainfield, I'd be so happy. Even better, we could take up a charitable contribution to replace his signage. My brother-in-law Adam could design the new logo. Oh, glorious.

Thanks, Diane...from both me and my friend, the oft-maligned apostrophe.

Meh.

2008-06-12T22:16:00.002-04:00

Dear Internet,

I am sorry I have not written in so long. I've been busy with stuff, like moving in with my in-laws and scrounging for a bicycle. Rest assured that I have accomplished both with great success and even left the house at 7:15 this morning for a 30-minute trek on the White Pine Trail. Internet, I made it all the way to that overpass that is somewhere between Belmont and Rockford. I don't know what road it is, but it is a good place to find phone numbers, gang tagging, and information about which middle school boys are gay (though I suppose the latter information might be unreliable, given that it is written in Sharpie by other middle school boys). All this, I think, explains why Josh hates Rockford so much.

For now, just know that I am battling hormone-fueled despair over the most mundane topics that would not normally bother me, like how much I spend on health insurance premiums and the way that used-car prices have skyrocketed over the past few years. You'd think a girl with a masters degree could buy a simple Honda Civic. You'd think. Whilst wallowing in such tragedies, I am working hard to fight the temptation to eat the entire contents of the cookie jar upstairs. Given my relationship with off-brand sandwich cookies, I'm doing relatively well.

Have a lovely evening, Internet, and pray for me in my silliness.

Love,
Laura

Even better!

2008-04-26T21:32:00.003-04:00

Thanks to Dan Falicki for his mad photoshop skillz.

Josh's Modeling Career

2008-04-24T22:24:00.003-04:00

I would like to know where the money from this gig went.

A birth.

2008-04-16T20:54:00.006-04:00

This afternoon I realized that the new Plainfield Meijer had opened today. I happened to be talking to Melissa right then and did my usual rubbing-in: "Melissa, I'm going to BRAND NEW SHINY MEIJER RIGHT NOW." See, Melly lives in LA and misses her Meijer desperately. I let her live vicariously through me, but I'm not always nice about it. Anyway, it was decided that I would go and take covert photos. The place was teeming with smiling staff in new shirts, which made the photography endeavor difficult. All the Holt Swimming girls can tell you that Meijer no likey cameras in their store. Somehow I made it out of there without criminal prosecution...

They built the new store behind the old store, which closed yesterday...obviously, they're not using this entrance yet...but soon the parking lot will be a whole lot bigger!

Hello, Hay Fever!

Very covert shot of the "WOOHOO we opened a new store!" balloon sculpture. This shot demonstrates about as much photography skill as what is possessed by my three-year-old nephew, Preston...

Lotsa meat. Satisfactory.

And these two are especially for Melissa...today we decided that the quintessential Midwestern diet consists primarily of hot dogs and chicken pot pies, as opposed to organic arugula (as is the case in LA).

Random. Nice lighting, I guess?

Mission Accomplished! I love my blue "green" Meijer bags.

It was nice, it was shiny, it smelled like fresh paint...but I have to say, I wasn't overly impressed. It was smaller than a lot of the other stores in the area and there wasn't anything particularly special about it. (Aside from the special Pot Pies section, that is.) My current ranking for the area:

1. Cascade
2. Knapp's Corner
3. Caledonia
4. Rockford (this would make #3 if I didn't feel like it was totally backwards)
5. Lowell (It's really very nice! I was surprised!)
6. Grandville
7. Plainfield
8. Jenison
9. Alpine
10. 54th/Clyde Park
11. 28th/Kalamazoo (otherwise affectionately known as "International Meijer")

Honorable Mention goes to Greenville, though I don't really consider it Grand Rapids-area.

And yes...I really did just write a big long blog about Meijer. What's more amazing is that I didn't do it for Target first. Maybe some other time...I'm still hoping that they'll open one in the Knapp's Corner area. Oh, a girl can dream...I love you, big box stores.

Ketchup.

2008-04-09T23:05:00.004-04:00

I haven't written anything substantive in awhile, I know...I'm sorry. Things have been a little topsy-turvy at times, and just generally busy all the time. I guess I'll start with the biggest topic...my Grandma R passed away two weeks ago after a very short stint with hospice. S'ok, really. She was 89, and it was time. It really was, and she was ready, both mentally and spiritually. We had a nice memorial service in Rochester Hills last Monday, and it was the first time that many members of my dad's family had been together since Gpa died in '93. It was really a great time...emotional, yes, but very good. Plus, we had Greek food for the luncheon...spinach pie, chicken and lamb kebabs, pita, cucumber sauce...from Gma's favorite local restaurant, The Crazy Greeks'. And and and I reunited with my cousin Lucas, whom I had not seen since 1990. I mean, really. My family is ridiculous like that. I kind of wish I had a big tribute, some sentimental words, some photos...but I don't. Almost doesn't seem fitting. Grandma was a very practical woman, and I think she'd want us all to be a little sad, but then just get on with it...and that's all I have to say.

While all this was going on, I had some very persistent stomach pain that, for awhile, appeared to be gallstones. It wasn't, and it's subsided, but it was still weird and scary. I decided that I don't ever want to have gallstones. My gallbladder stores the bile produced by my liver, and I think it's doing a damn fine job of it, so I'd like to keep it, if that's okay.

Hmm, what else? Today I became the most bizarre kind of grown-up and bought professional liability insurance. Yeah, you know, like what doctors get in case their patients sue them. Because, let's face it...my very livelihood entails that I spend time with some people who...erm...have some problems. And some of these people have the potential to engage in projection and transference and all kinds of other fun stuff that could put my professional reputation in jeopardy, through no fault of my own. Did you know that the State of Michigan considers me a Health Professional? Uh-HUH.

And that is all. (This is how one of my young clients ends every story she tells me. It's cute.)

****UPDATED...FOR JON'S SAKE****

Yesterday I went to the Knapp's Corner Meijer and bought ketchup and Saran Wrap. I went home, put the ketchup in the fridge, and put the Saran Wrap in the drawer. The End.

Regrets are for horseshoes and handbags.

2008-04-06T21:58:00.003-04:00

If Josh hadn't gotten to me first, I would happily marry this man, roaming the Lower 48 in his Nissan to do God's Own Work.

Thanks, Anne, for the link!

I think I'm related to the president(s).

2008-03-17T13:56:00.003-04:00

Now, way back when, my Grandpa Chipman all but figured out that we had an ancestor on the Mayflower. I got a little off track at work today and found this posting on a surname website. I figured out that if all this is, in fact, true, that John Howland is the ancestor in question. Click his name and go down to "Notable Descendants."

I can't get my head around this today. I called my mom and she said the only piece of info we're missing has to do with my great-great-great grandparents and apparently can be found at the Mecosta County courthouse. We're going to take a day off work sometime and go up there. I thought the Mayflower thing was a big enough deal, but all those presidents? And Robert E. Lee? And Alec Baldwin???? Yowza.

Yet more shameless self-indulgence...

2008-03-13T22:10:00.003-04:00

...though cut me some slack, it was decreed by Diane.

A) Four jobs I have had in my life:
1. Wendy's bun toaster/dishwasher/put-bacon-in-the-oven-er/Salad Bar guru/Queen of the Pick-Up window
2. YMCA lifeguard/puke cleaner-upper/pH tester/fodder for lecherous old hot tub-lounging men
3. Head Lifeguard/grass mower/fornication patrol for a county park
4. Therapist/world-saver/backstage manager for Jerry Springer-like existence

B) Four movies I would watch over and over (or have watched over and over):
1. Office Space (I own a red stapler...and so does Josh)
2. Best In Show (GENIUS)
3. Monty Python and the Holy Grail
4. Romy and Michele's High School Reunion

C) Four places I have lived:
1. Traverse City, MI
2. Saginaw, MI (Marie, did you live there when I was in 2nd grade? Ha.)
3. Holt, MI
4. Kalamazoo, MI

D) Four TV shows that I watch:
1. 30 Rock
2. 30 Rock
3. SNL
4. The O'Reilly Factor

E) Four places I have been:
1. San Francisco
2. Amarillo, TX (home of the Cadillac Ranch and Ricky's Towing)
3. Portsmouth, NH
4. Berea, KY (damn beautiful town)

F) Four people who email [or call] me regularly:
1. Yosh (like that wasn't obvious)
2. My mother
3. My mother-in-law
4. Kimmy
(Honestly, people, it's all about texting and the internet)

G) Four of my favorite foods:
1. Frosted Mini-Wheats
2. Strawberry Edy's Fruit Bars
3. Broccoli
4. Cosmopolitans (YES, they're food!)

H) Four places I would like to be right now:
1. Target (buying new bikes)
2. A salvage yard (searching for that Mazda3 of my dreams)
3. Swimming 1000 SKIPS in a 25-yard-pool
4. Biking the White Pine Trail (see #1)

I) Four things I am looking forward to this year:
1. Going to Miami ("welcome to Miami" - Will Smith)
2. Going to EUROPE!
3. Paying off some STUFF
4. Retiring Patsy for a newer car (that is not rapidly approaching 200K miles)

J) Four people who should/will [respond] post FOUR THINGS ABOUT THEM:
1. Melissa (who, I think, will second that emotion in regards to Amarillo, TX)
2. Anne (who works for Speculum Wealth)
3. Trace (preferably in Afrikaans)
4. Rudi (preferably in Hungarian)

Parental Guidance Suggested

2008-02-21T20:07:00.000-05:00

...because I said "dead" once and "meth" twice.

Deadly Sin #6, courtesy of the United States Postal Service

2008-02-17T15:08:00.005-05:00

Shame on Melissa for sending me this...but I have to say, it made me laugh hard in memory of our recent conversations, which would be some variation of the following:

Me: Pooky, it snowed thirty-six inches today and the wind chill is a thousand below zero.
Mel: MOVE TO CALIFORNIA!

Productivity

2008-02-17T14:42:00.005-05:00

One thing I absolutely hate is lounging around, unshowered and in my pajamas until 4:00 pm on a Saturday (which, I'm embarrassed to admit, is more the norm than the exception). Yesterday was refreshingly different - I went to the new house and painted the first coat on the master bedroom and the bathroom, with the help of Ebeth, Sarah, and Kimmy. Looks good, no? The bathroom color is Dutch Boy's Biloxi Blues and the bedroom is called Bamboo, which is totally suitable given our longstanding Asian decor theme in there :) Kimmy and I are going back today to do the second coat, but I'm worried about how it's going to go, as neither she nor I are gifted with Sarah's exceptional cutting-in skills. Pray for us, por favor.

August 2008

2008-02-08T23:19:00.000-05:00

Grand Rapids. London. Bath. London. Paris. Frankfurt. Munich. Salzburg. Rome. Munich. Grand Rapids.

The Von Trapp tour will be commencing shortly, as will the Jane Austen walking tour.

Happy New Year...?

2008-01-30T21:56:00.001-05:00

Guess who this stinker is? My dad's so creative. (Didja notice the cloth diaper, huh, Kate?)

I meant to write this 29 days ago, I swear.

I've thought a lot about it, and in recent years I've decided that I'm not a big fan of New Year's resolutions. I mean, it's kind of unrealistic that beginning on Day One you're going to do a total 180 when it comes to your body, your finances, your spiritual life, whatever. (Thank you, Bridget Jones, for so amusingly showing me this in your stream-of-consciousness prose. I love you, even though you're not real.)

I am, however, in support of the symbolism of a new year, of turning over a new leaf, much in the same way that Easter is reminiscent of eggs and rabbits. Okay, maybe not the best metaphor, but bear with me. I'm not a believer in saying, "Starting January 1st I'm going to be 100% better at this, this, and this." I do think, though, that it's a good time to set goals for oneself in the coming year. Do you think, maybe, that goals might keep us going to the gym past mid-February? Maybe...if you haven't set impossible standards for yourself, you're less likely to feel like an utter failure and throw in the towel for the rest of the year, yes?

Our goals for this year include...living in a way that honors our bodies (portion control = good, Krispy Kremes = less so), interacting with our finances on more of a daily basis (including actually sticking to the budget we spend so much time creating), traveling more, and chipping away at some lingering debt.

Now, we're doing fairly well with the first two. Not perfect, no earth-shattering changes, but guess what? I guarantee we'll still be working on them come May. We're making more concrete plans for a Florida trip in May and a Europe trip in August, including money and logistics. (Remind me to apply for my passport!) The debt one, though, is the one I'm going to talk most about today, because I'm really proud of us.

We talked one day last weekend and decided that we need to make some sacrifices toward this one. Not that we have much leeway in our budget, honestly...but we both, uniformly decided to get rid of cable. For our own good. Unilaterally. Oh, how good it felt. We also decided not to join the Y as we'd previously planned...part of the reason being that the "scholarship" they offered us was $74 a month, more than twice what it was this summer. Not affordable right now. But little did we know there was more to the story...that night, a friend of a friend called Josh and basically said, "Hey, my roommate's moving out, I heard you might be looking for a place to live, come live at my house for $200 a month cheaper than what you're paying." Initially, we weren't really about it...we don't know this guy. We don't want to share living space with someone else. No. We're selfish creatures of comfort. The next morning, we both woke up thinking, "Ohhhh, but we could pay off our debt FASTER. We can DEFINITELY go to Europe before we have kids. Hmmm." Josh called the guy, who was on his way home from work. We went over, looked at the place, and talked to him for awhile. Not a red flag to be seen. We felt very comfortable with everything, and after a few days of thinking about it, we decided that we're doing it. It's open-ended - we can decide to move out whenever we want. We'll have the whole 2nd floor (2 bedrooms and a bath) to ourselves...he sleeps in the basement and we'd share the main floor (kitchen, living, dining room) with him. It's a nice, well-cared for house. He said we could paint our rooms if we want. I'm two miles from my office instead of 15 (which I figure will save me alone at least $60 a month in gas). We'll be giving up some things for awhile, yes - the use of all our stuff (some of it will go into storage), total control over our domain, cable (yes, we're sticking to that one!), some privacy, maybe...but it's good. Making steps to improve your life is HARD. You gotta give a little. You've got to be creative and unorthodox sometimes. We're not thrilled about moving in the winter, we're not totally comfortable with everything we'll be giving up. But guess what I tell my clients? The definition of insanity is doing what you've always done and expecting a different result. Change is uncomfortable, but being comfortable isn't really getting us anywhere in this department...so change it is. (Yeah, that's right, I got all therapy on you - THAT JUST HAPPENED!)

We're moving on Feb. 23rd. Wish us luck...and if anyone wants to help paint or help us lug some stuff in or out of a U-Haul, please let me know :) We can't offer you much beyond pizza and love, except we'll get whatever kind of pizza you want and even get you a soda :) Oh, and moving things to and fro burns calories, DID YOU EVEN KNOW THAT? Wow.

Oh, and the newest "Lainey's The Cutest Thing Ever" photo (I made her necklace):

Because everyone's birthday should be a week long...

2008-01-30T21:22:00.001-05:00

The photo is grainy and I am regrettably more prominent than The Birthday Girl, but it just captures her essence so well. On Sunday my dear old friend Melissa turned 28...

10. About 5 years ago we realized that we were coming up on our 10-year anniversary of friendship. We talked exhaustively about our big plans for an anniversary date, and (shockingly), that never actually happened. Nor did, for that matter, our 15th Anniversary date.

9. Mel and I have a special relationship...if you see or hear us throwing vicious threats (i.e. "You haven't rented 30 Rock yet? I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!") or, alternately, being a little pseudo-sexual and disturbingly affectionate, don't worry. We both like our boys plenty well. We just have an interesting dynamic that includes a little dirty talk every now and then. Just love us anyway, okay?

8. Speaking of which...Mel has a little habit of talking in her sleep. A few years ago in a hotel room in Anaheim, I was awakened by her mumbling. I said, "What?" She said, "I want to put your butt in my mouth." I said, "WHAT?" (laughing very hard, mind you), and she said, "It's a San Diego thing." Laura: "A SAN DIEGO THING?" Melissa: "Actually, it's a WORLD thing." Best conversation I've ever had with her. The other day I sent her a text message that said, "Happy birthday, Buttmouther."

7. I've called Melissa many nicknames over the years, including Pooky, Sugar, Smelly Melly, Kymmel (which is actually used when referring jointly to her and Kym), and the aforementioned Buttmouther. I think it's a keeper, don't you?

6. In 7th grade we walked home from school together all the time even though she lived just far enough away to ride the bus. Usually our travels took us to DeRosa's Party Store for a Little Debbie and Crystal Pepsi. One day we had gotten only so far as the Crystal Bar when I suddenly turned around and slapped her across the face For No Apparent Reason. She said, "Ow! Why did you do that?" I said, "I don't know, I just felt like it." We both found it incredibly funny at the time...and still do. (I'm so glad that I've learned some basic social norms since.)

5. Melissa has given me some nicknames, too, which include PiPi, Pooky, and Chia Pet. (Ask me about that last one some other time...not for the squeamish.)

4. Melissa and I met in 7th grade...hard to say whether or not it was in band class or in swim club. We competed against each other for first chair clarinet, played Celebration by Kool and the Gang, went to countless swim meets together, spent our summers going for bike rides and runs, got our moms to drive us to the mall for Champion shirts and Bass shoes, went sledding at Dead Man's Hill with trays stolen from Wendy's, watched The Cutting Edge in her basement, ended up college roommates (best time of my life), and I drove with her across the country when she moved to LA 3 1/2 years ago. I never knew that you could have so much fun squished in an overpacked Chevy Cavalier for four days straight. Better vacation than even my honeymoon, I tell you.

3. Back in the day we had another friend named Lisa, who once said that Melissa's sister was actually her mom, her mother was actually her Aunt Frank, and her father was named Larry Bon-Bon. I've been calling Larry that ever since, much to Melissa's chagrin.

2. Have I mentioned that we were WEIRD ADOLESCENTS who ended up surprisingly well-adjusted?

1. Melly now lives in West Hollywood with her boyfriend Ray (who is perfect for her) and her cat Napoleon...she's armed with a fresh Masters in Film and is working on breaking into the film editing industry. I made her promise to take me to the Oscars someday.

I Googled myself...

2008-01-25T00:43:00.001-05:00

...would you believe there's several more of me out there? I couldn't believe it.

Well, kids, I've decided to follow Anne's lead and remove all occurrences of my last name from the ol' blog...consequently, this has changed my URL, so I'm sure none of you are even reading this. I'll e-mail ya. Anyway, I'm doing this because it came to my attention that if I were to apply for a new job (IF...not that I would ever do such a thing), someone out there might think to google me, and quite frankly I probably don't censor myself enough on the ol' interweb. Thus, I must go into hiding. I know our last name is our trademark, and it's fun to say and type, but for the sake of being a responsible grown up (blech), I'm going to have to ask you to not use it on this blog. Or, if you must, replace the i with an asterisk or something, as if it were a dirty word (which it sometimes is...let's use it as a verb, no? WITH ASTERISK!)

Sorry, all...

Don't worry...it wasn't us.

2008-01-24T22:27:00.000-05:00

I returned home tonight around 8:30, and as I wove my way through the complex, I saw increasingly odd sights. The clubhouse was alit and filled with people ("Okay, not so unusual for someone to rent it out for a party on a weeknight"), then I passed a big ol' Consumers Energy truck sitting alongside the road, doing absolutely nothing ("That's weird, everyone seems to have electricity..."), then I came around the bend...all manner of emergency vehicles in full glory. The building just beyond ours was illuminated with red and white strobes, and a fire truck crane was hovering over the building. A Fox 17 mobile broadcast truck was there, too, satellite dish engaged. I couldn't quite see what was going on (fire? C02 leak? Meth lab?). I went inside, could find nothing on the news, so came back outside with my mom on the phone...still can't tell and don't want to get so close as to be barked at by police officer or similar. Went back inside because it was too cold for other gawkers, who would've been my only source of good information. Finally got the story on the 10:00 news (because at 11, it's history!) Courtesy of WXMI Fox 17 (the only news outlet who cared enough to come all da way out here):

Fire At Gaines Township Apartment Building

January 24, 2008

GAINES TOWNSHIP — About two dozen tentants evacuated a Gaines Township apartment complex Thursday night after a fire broke out in one of the apartments.

The fire started around 7 p.m. at The Crossings apartment complex near the South Beltline and Eastern Avenue.

Firefighters saw flames shooting from the roof when they arrived on scene. They dispatched an aerial truck and knocked down the fire before it could spread.

The fire damaged two apartments, one with smoke and the other from fire damage.

No one was injured, but some residents disregarded the fire alarms that rang through the complex.

"Fire alarms outside activated, some people failed to realize those alarms mean time to get out," said Dutton Fire Chief Russ Jansen.

Fire investigators think the fire may have started on a second floor balcony. It remains under investigation.

Thank you, Lord, for yet more affirmation that it is indeed good to be overinsured. Amen.

Happy Birthday, Kym!

2008-01-05T22:34:00.000-05:00

Today is my BFF Kym's 28th birthday. Anne beat me to the birthday list, but you can never have too many fun facts about my one-time twin. However, in lieu of the usual facts, I'm going to indulge in some memories:

10. In 9th grade history class, Kym and I convinced Anne that Kym had a cool older sister named Hunter. We kept up this charade for weeks.

9. Kym and I (and our dads) went to tour GVSU's campus together in 12th grade. She'd had some sort of foot issue, and my knee was acting up, so we were both on crutches...we decided to make the most of it by wearing matching outfits. We got a lot of attention from everyone else in the tour group.

8. It has only been in the past two years or so that people have run into me and not said, "So where's Kym?"

7. Kym changes teeth like some people change cell phones. (But that's a sensitive issue, so let's not discuss it any further.)

6. Kym and I encountered each other often in middle school (7th grade Stage Band, 8th grade Honors Algebra) before we finally got acquainted in the aforementioned history class. Thank you, Mr. Spencer, for your marvelous livelong friendship fostering skills. And for teaching us how to make birchbark canoes and rifles.

5. Kym and I decided to be roommates in college despite everyone's warnings that you should NOT! room with your best friend from high school. Boy, did we prove them wrong. We lived together all four years...though our senior year, we decided to "branch out" and not live in the same bedroom...though who were we kidding, our two-bedroom apartment was only so big!

4. Kym and I share a larger than life affinity for Sweetwater's Donuts (one of Kym's favorites is the Sugar Raised), Hunan Gardens Chinese Restaurant, Taco Bell, Target, and the films Evita and Anastasia.

3. Kym eventually plans to have her first name legally changed from Kimberly to Kymberli.

2. I have a notebook FILLED with "notes" from the religion class we took together junior year of college - she and I sat in the back row and played hangman for two hours every Tuesday and Thursday. Many of our hangman messages were related to donuts (i.e. "DONUT FEVER!"), as we always stopped at Sweetwater's on our way home from class.

1. We've both grown and changed over the years, and we now live far apart, but nothing can replace all those years of fantastic memories :) HELLO KITTY! I honestly don't have anywhere near as many inside jokes with anyone as I do with this fine chica. I love you, girl...Happy 28th!

This is my official Debbie Downer post

2007-12-01T02:11:00.000-05:00

Picture me as Rachel Dratch. Not really. Overall it's been a pretty good week, but I had to share the two icky things that bookended my week:

Monday: I drove to Muskegon and met my parents and my Uncle Brian (otherwise known as Uncle Daddy...and no, we're not Appalachian) in Muskegon for...yup...a funeral. We'd gotten a call on Thanksgiving that Aunt Bonnie died that day of pneumonia. Now, Aunt Bonnie is my dad's aunt, grandma's sister, my great aunt. I've always thought she was just a great lady. We spent a good amount of time with her over the years and I can't tell you how good she's been to my family. I had no idea how amazing she really was. She had one of those Life Story funerals, so I learned a lot of things...she had tuberculosis as a child and spent a year in a sanitarium. She lost her firstborn child at 5 months to a crib accident. She worked full-time as a teacher while raising four kids. She was two classes short of her doctorate when she retired. She was diagnosed with lung cancer and had one of her lungs removed in 1983. The doctors said she would only live five more years, and she lived 24. She died at age 85. Unbelievable. It was nice to see my dad's cousins, not to mention their kids, whom I haven't seen since we were all little (and they don't remember me because they're so much younger than I).

Aunt Bonnie's church was someplace I had been twice before in my life, and when I arrived I remembered that when I was younger I used to have a recurring dream that took place in that church. I was being stalked by a man I never actually saw. I ran up some back stairs in an attempt to reach safety (I could hear women in the kitchen talking), and just as I'd reach the top step, he'd grab my ankle and I'd wake up. I probably had this dream four or so times since I'd last been there, so it was definitely a strange feeling to actually revisit the place. I'm weird, I know.

Friday: I was on my way to Kent City to see one of my kids for counseling. I KNEW the roads were bad up that way. I KNEW I shouldn't have been in the left lane when there was slush in it. Nonetheless, right at the exit for 14 Mile I hit a patch of slush and started skidding/fishtailing this way and that. My ONLY concern was the huge oil tanker that was not too far behind me...more specifically, I wanted in no uncertain terms to avoid any contact with it. As my car flailed around across the two lanes, I spoke aloud exactly these words: "Sh*t-sh*t-sh*t-sh*t-ditch-ditch-ditch-ditch!" I wanted that ditch. I wanted to be cradled in its loving arms so very badly. Then I saw the other car in the ditch, and I hoped I could avoid hitting that as well. Finally, FINALLY, my tail end spun to the left and placed itself (thank you) in the ditch with my front tires resting on the rumble strip, my car at a perfectly square 90 degrees of oncoming traffic. Once I ensured I wasn't going to have a heart attack, I looked left and saw yet another car about 20 feet away...must have followed me into the ditch. (Have I mentioned that I love the ditch?) The guy in the silver Grand Am came over, asked if I was okay, and said, "I was watching you, that was really scary!" I said, "You're telling ME!" The driver of the Jeep Liberty managed to get hisself out of the ditch with his 4-Wheel drive and came over to help. I immediately got on the horn and called Progressive to send a tow truck. Mr. Grand Am said he'd called Progressive over two hours ago for his tow. We all decided that I could probably get myself out once there was a break in traffic...with a little push from my new friends, I did. I thanked them. I called Progressive and canceled my tow. I proceeded on to Kent City. While driving, I started thinking about what could have happened (oh my GOSH what could've happened), pulled over in a party store parking lot, and started bawling. I decided that I wouldn't do much good helping people heal emotionally in that kind of state, so I canceled my appointments and headed over to Josh's parents' house.

Aside from typing all that out, I'm trying really hard not to think about it.

Anyway, today's a new day, I'm excited about it, and it's well past time I went to bed. Thanks for reading all my adjectives, friends :)

Happy Birthday, Grandma!

2007-11-20T18:27:00.001-05:00

Today is Grandma Chipman's 91st birthday. Here are ten things you may not know about her:

10. When she was a little girl, she saw her first airplane fly by and she was so excited that she wet her long bloomers.

9. She had a nice wedding planned but it was changed quite a bit when my grandpa's deployment was moved up during World War II.

8. Grandma's favorite TV show is All Creatures Great and Small; this has been her favorite show for at least 25 years.

7. Unlike many people her age, she is a die-hard Democrat and likes to tell me why Debbie Stabenow is the best choice.

6. As you may have previously heard via my blog, every article of clothing Grandma C wears is made by Alfred Dunner.

5. Grandma didn't learn how to pump her own gas until about eight years ago.

4. Grandma had her hands full with my mom and my Aunt Candy, who did not get along at. all.

3. She has always had a great distaste for cats. In fact, when I was about six years old I brought my stuffed Garfield over to her house and she took one look at it and said, "Cats are evil." (Sorry, Anne.)

2. She makes the best icebox cookies in the world.

1. She has a very dry, sarcastic sense of humor that I've really begun to appreciate a lot these past few years.

Tagge'd

2007-11-17T22:09:00.000-05:00

So Diane got me. (Mainly because I whined.)

Here's how you play....once you have been tagged, you have to write a blog with ten random facts, habits, or goals about yourself. At the end, choose ten people to tag, listing their names and why you chose them; don't forget to leave a comment on their page letting them know "tag you're it". You cannot tag the original people/person back that tagged you first, but let them know when you have posted so they can read your blog.

10. I love dogs. I want a dog very badly...but unfortunately we live in an apartment complex that is [apparently] a police state and does not allow anything furry and comforting (other than Josh, that is). A smallish dog like a pomeranian or cocker spaniel would be perfect. For the record, I'm not such a big fan of cats, but I do have an affinity for cats who are really dogs at heart, like my brother-in-law's cat Ned.

9. I had ancestors on the Mayflower. One of these Thanksgivings I'm going to make everyone dress up as Pilgrims, as we are usually with our Pilgrim side of the family for turkey day.

8. I love love love Saturday Night Live. I have a very irreverent sense of humor. I could spend hours on their website watching the video clips. Click the link for something hilarious...Andy Punches

7. I have recently re-resigned from my self-appointed role as Cruise Director of my life. I like using the Cruise Director analogy to indicate someone who is in charge of a given situation. I'm going back to my cabin and awaiting the next port of call. (This is the point at which the metaphor gets incredibly cheesy.)

6. I have a band of very longtime friends who I am incredibly loyal to. Lately I've really been enjoying and treasuring the way our connections to one another have morphed and changed over time...sniff.

5. I intend to be employed as a Zamboni driver before I die.

4. I have a girl crush on one Tina Fey. She's so great. Josh bought me Season 1 of 30 Rock for my birthday and it was the best thing I didn't know I needed to own. I keep offering to loan it to people, so they too can know the joy, but I can't actually bring myself to part with it.

3. I've been having a series of epiphanies lately (related to #7). Ask me about them sometime, and please bear with me as I work on figuring it all out.

2. During my freshman year of college I became known as my floor's resident computer techie-slash-Master Paper Proofreader. I coulda made money hand over fist if I'd had any assertiveness skills back then.

1. I love me some lime pepper Talapia.

I tag Anne because she's put up with so much over the years and loves me anyway... Melissa because we never got to go on our 10th (or 15th) anniversary date...I tag Rudi because he married my friend Errin and has made her a very happy woman...I tag Sarah despite the fact that she only writes in her blog once a year, because she keeps me sane at many a family gathering...and Jon because, well, he's an absolute riot, and even though I haven't spent any time with him in a few years, he's the best SaHD I know. Further, I tag Eliina because she and I started a gang in high school called Los Chulos Cubanos (The Cuban Pimps)...or maybe her gang name was Chulo Cubano. I can't remember. And that's all I've got.

Houseguest

2007-10-25T23:06:00.000-04:00

We have a visitor for a few days...say hi to our dog nephew, Noah. His mama went to Mackinac Island for a few days. Here's the hitch - we live in a pet-free community, and after two years of living here, I've come to believe that they really are nazis about this. I have never seen a snuck-in dog or cat. We're being risky here, people, but it's all worth it, no?

Noah was pretty skittish at first, as we were hearing noises from the neighbor's apartments, but Josh's mom tipped me off that a heating pad will calm him right down. I pulled mine out from the nightstand, and man oh man did he get excited. She was right, he chilled right out! What a funny little guy.

As is appropriate (given his heritage), we'll be taking him to TexasNorth tomorrow...for a hayride...and if you're lucky, I'll get a picture of him playing inside the dishwasher.

On disappointment...

2007-10-15T23:19:00.000-04:00

I recently told you about a potential living situation that, at the time, seemed unbelievably God-driven. A friend of mine, her husband, and their four children were very, very likely going to be moving to China for a two-year-long job assignment. They asked if we'd consider living in their house while they're gone. Rent-free.

Yeah, you heard me.

In a surprising turn of events, what was once a 95% certainty became 0%. They've been told that, as a family of six, they're too expensive to send there. I got the e-mail yesterday afternoon.

Yesterday was a rough day, to be sure. I had to drive Josh back to church for his guitar-playing artistry. I had been planning to attend that service, but I was a crying, sorrowful mess...and to be perfectly honest, I was not feeling at all worshipful and was pretty angry. Fortunately that's abated now, but in the meantime I was determined that retail therapy was my cure. I left the mall empty-handed, as the pants I wanted did not want to fit me yesterday. Insult to injury! (Though it was a bit comical.) Thanks to those of you who sensed something was a bit off with me and offered me e-mails and/or MySpace comments of encouragement. Your words were incredibly helpful, even if you didn't quite know what you were comforting me about.

I did have a much better day today, though. I forced myself to think about the positive outcomes of this - we can still move come January if we want to. We could lease month-to-month and move at some point after that. There's some freedom involved, even if it isn't the financial freedom we were so looking forward to. We're not sure what we'll do, but it's good to have choices. It also helped that yesterday morning (prior to getting this news), I cleaned the bejeezus out of our apartment and thought to myself, "I love my home." There's something to be said for all this.

But it's still a bummer.

On a totally unrelated note, I'd like to recommend a fine drink called Chaider. Now, if you're totally culinarily-challenged, you can go pick one up at Kava House...hot or iced. (I love me some Kava.) OR OR OR if you'd like to save money and feel like a domestic god-dess (yes, say it that way), go buy yourself some Tazo Chai concentrate (they have it at Target and other fine establishments) and some cider. Pour 4 oz Chai into a mug, then fill it up the rest of the way with cider. Work that microwave for 2 1/2 minutes, stir well, and collapse on the floor in ecstasy...fer real. It's way up there with Kate's mac and cheese.

You can thank me later...with lavish gifts, if so inclined.

Little wonders...

2007-10-07T00:04:00.000-04:00

Ok, so I'm going to hijack Chris' subject matter tonight...our dear Shauna Niequist has published a gorgeous book about the joys of the minutiae of life. Albeit, I have yet to read the whole thing (aside from the sample chapters on her website), but I am confident I can assign the word gorgeous to it, because nothing she produces could possibly be otherwise.

Today was another one of those great days in which I got to hang out with Adam and Sarah's kids. There's four of them. They're very busy. They're usually clambering all over each other. But gosh, they're fabulous little people. I spent the evening lamenting the fact that I'd forgotten my camera (my apologies for the pictureless post)...but let me tell you the highlights of my day with each of them.

Lainey...at 14 months, she has just mastered the art of standing up on her own and will walk if you hold her hands. She loves to hold entire conversations with you...you may not understand all the dialogue, but no worries - she does. Everything she sees, she points at, looks at you, and says, "wassat?" Tonight I gave her and Preston a joint bath, and let me tell you - the girl loves her some splashing. As I got concerned about how wet I was getting, I had to keep reminding myself of the pure joy she was in the midst of, and to just savor it.

Preston...what a little man he is. It's so hard to believe that he was only five months old when I first met him. He's surely bound for MENSA membership one of these days, and the expressions he makes with his chocolate brown eyes (set against his white-blond hair) are just priceless. The last time I watched him, he announced that he wanted "cornedbeefhashandeggs" for lunch. Tonight for dinner, he requested salami and cheese. Gosh, it's SO hard to believe that he and Josh were born on the same day. (Ha!) I also had to put him in time out twice today. He gets so so upset when he's put in time out, but he totally forgives me. Immediately.

Evan...well, lately we've been a bit concerned about Evan because he's a bit of a drama queen. Something tiny doesn't go his way? Total meltdown. Today, though, he had the most fabulous day. I've never had such an easy time with him. He showed me how to use the ridiculously complicated TV/DVD/cable hookup in the living room. He told me that Lainey takes soymilk in her bottle. He dressed as Darth Vader for our walk around the neighborhood. He told me that yes, in fact, he would like broccoli with his dinner. Sarah and I later concluded that it was because Spencer wasn't home and thus Evan got to be my helper and was therefore involved. Poor kid. Classic middle child...so often, I think he's just trying to make sure he doesn't get lost in the shuffle. I just love Evan.

Spencer...well, admittedly, he was at a friend's house all day and I saw him for exactly 2.5 seconds when he got home. However, he called TWICE prior to coming home to let me know where he was at, and could I please tell Evan that he could sleep downstairs with Spencer in his room tonight? This was very important. What nearly-12-year-old boy makes such a point of having his six-year-old brother down to his room for a slumber party? I can't speak highly enough about Spencer. He's such a phenomenal kid.

Here's to all of us taking note of the glorious little moments of our day...

Ch-ch-ch-chaaanges...

2007-09-25T22:31:00.000-04:00

Hello, friends. I'm feeling listy today.

1. My office moved. Just about everybody moved somewhere. My new office isn't really any further away and I now share with only one person instead of two. Tyler and I will get on well, I think. We've already made a joint dorm fridge purchase on Craigslist to store Diet Coke, and...well, that's probably about it. I will miss the Eastown bus stop out my window, however...some days more than others. Let's just say that.

2. We've had some financial fallout from the whole condo thing...on top of losing a $500 deposit (which we were fine with), we've learned that when you apply for a mortgage, lots of people come out of the woodwork. Two in particular who say that somebody owes them some money for certain utilities they utilized while living in Allendale, MI at some point in their young adulthood.*

3. I just got a paper cut opening an envelope from one of these woodwork-type people. And it bled.

4. We're meeting on Thursday with some people about an intriguing possibility that is increasingly looking likely come January. I won't go into details just now - mainly because we don't know too many, and also because we haven't had enough of the important conversations yet. Let's just put it this way - this possibility involves shelter for the Mikrut Party of Two, and it does not include purchase OR rental. Nor does it involve a cardboard box (as I know this is your next question). If you've read Diane's blog recently, we are indeed some of the people she was referring to when she said, "Over the last few weeks I've heard many crazy stories from my friends on how Tiger is meeting their needs in such crazy and nonsensical ways and we wonder, in the end, why it's always a surprise." Yup. You'll know more when we feel we have enough info and certainty to share it.

5. For the next week and a half, we are On A Mission. We're going to create the most bizarre meals, as we are going to use only What We Already Have. I'm having a vision...I'm thinking oatmeal with a side of beets. For Lunch. Maybe.

6. Oh, and also, we're both determined to get healthier, so we're making changes simultaneously to help motivate each other. It's pretty great. Today I ate FIVE servings of fruits and vegetables. Ooops, that reminds me - I forgot to take me vitamin.

Right. Bedtime.

*Laura has NEVER been a resident of Allendale, MI.

Tell Josh congrats...

2007-09-12T22:01:00.000-04:00

...and say hi to Lainey while you're at it.

This may look like a random assortment of Roman numerals, but I assure you, friends...it is not.

It's report card season again, wOOt wOOt!

The new chalkboard announcement tells us that Josh got the certificate of merit for his Civil Procedures class. For those of you who are not Eliina, this means he got the highest grade in the class, beating out 39 other people. This is a bigger deal than it might seem...he gets an actual certificate and gets to make a note of it on his resume. The boy's in shock, he's really not sure how this happened but golly is he joyful.

Now, if I could only remember where I put the "Josh" confetti...

Happy Birthday, Nate!

2007-09-10T00:23:00.001-04:00

Josh's little brother Nate turns 17 today. Here's a few interesting things about him:

5. Nate is child #5 out of six. Nate is also fortunate enough to be one of the only Mikruts with his Very Own Birthday (see earlier posts).

4. When Nate was confirmed, he had to choose a confirmation name. He chose Paul. This makes his full name Nathan Paul Paul Mikrut. He's hilarious.

3. We haven't seen Nate's eyes in several years due to his flowing tresses.

2. Josh and I frequently comment that Nate is a very good kid.

1. Nate borrowed my car for his drivers license test a few months ago. The check engine light has been on ever since...but at least he passed.

EEEEEK! I forgot!

2007-09-02T00:49:00.000-04:00

I fell off my birthday list wagon! How could I forget? Certainly, I didn't forget the birthdays themselves, but in the wild joys of the early days of my vacation, I totally forgot to post. My apologies to the boys who helped me prepare for the trials of living with THE boy.

First, on the 25th, we have my illustrious brother Steve, who turned 26:

10. People often ask where Steve gets his red hair, as my parents and I all have dark brown hair. In reality, both sides of the family are blessed with that recessive gene - mom's mom has red hair, as do three of my dad's four siblings. In fact, Russell is a Scottish (and French) nickname for redhead.

9. When we were little, I had a friend over, and she and I made up a song to tease Steve that went, "Stevie Wonder's gonna get hit by thunder." I remembered the lyrics but forgot which friend it was. I was later reunited with Kim in college when I befriended her best friend Tanya - she remembered it too. Mystery solved.

8. When we moved to Lansing, six-year-old Steve got his hands on one of those Graphic Street Guide books (i.e. "For Walnut St, see page 37, coordinates A-9") and the kid memorized it. He also told my parents how to get around town.

7. Steve remembers the birthday of everyone he's ever met. He's going to be a big hit at his high school reunion.

6. As a preschooler, Steve's most treasured companion was an old, tattered Sears Christmas catalog.

5. Steve was once an ardent admirer of Cookie Monster and owned several related items, including this one.

4. Give Steve any date in history, and he will tell you what day of the week it fell on.

3. Steve is an accomplished public speaker; he once performed a solo act on one of our high school mission trips that had an incredibly funny punchline about a blue-light special.

2. Steve works in the library of the Lansing branch of Josh's law school.

1. Steve just moved out into his first apartment and we're all very happy for him!

Daddy-o then turned 66 on the 27th (because the Mikruts aren't the only ones who can pile up birthdays on top of each other) -

10. Dad was a honeymoon baby. I figured this out when I was about 11, and as his 50th birthday was approaching, I realized, "Hey, wait a minute...we just had Grandma and Grandpa's 50th anniversary party...nine months ago?"

9. His middle name is Sean, although my Grandma has always insisted that it is pronounced "Seen," which she claims is the Scottish pronunciation.

8. When I was a kid, Daddy and I always got up early together on Saturdays to watch The Muppet Show and the cartoons that followed. One of his favorite ways to get my goat was to insist that he and Gargamel were the best of friends.

7. Being the jokester that he is, Dad once painstakingly crafted gag Christmas gifts for some of his co-workers. I remember him retrofitting a string of Christmas lights, four lights in length, to plug into a co-worker's outlet. The lucky recipient was apparently very vocal about how much he hated Christmas lights.

6. I remember Dad working hard on preparations for one of my birthday parties; he got a book of kids' games from the library and my favorite of these was a shuttle relay in which we had to carry a golf ball on a spoon and hand it off to the next person without dropping it.

5. When my mom was nearing the end of her pregnancy with Steve, Dad was very insistent that 40 was too old to be welcoming a new child into the fold. Steve was born two days before Dad's 40th birthday, and Dad has been most appreciative ever since.

4. Dad has always been handy and creative in the area of woodworking. He has spent many Saturday afternoons in front of the TV watching Bob Vila on PBS, though now his interest has shifted to gardening.

3. Only my father would purchase one of those faces that you put on a big ol' tree.

2. Papa was a sailor in the Navy. He loves boats, books about boats, books about wars between boats, and all things Tom Clancy. He and Josh get along so, so well.

1. My father is one of the only people I know who does not like Mexican food. Poor guy - doesn't know what he's missing, I say.

A quagmire of epiphanies (both complete and partially formed)

2007-08-30T13:51:00.000-04:00

Yesterday was a day of wrestling...with numbers on a yellow legal pad, with expectations, and with God.

In short, we decided to walk away from our condo purchase.

Upon evaluating the final numbers and our own situation, we came to realize that it simply wasn't wise for a number of reasons. As much as we wanted to do this, we want to make sure we're coming at it from a position of financial strength, more so than right now.

Wrestling is tiring. But it brings freedom, too, and we're feeling that in spite of our disappointment. I'm tempted to be a little embarrassed about the whole thing, especially with how much we've been talking about it to people, but ultimately I'm proud of the decision we made and know that you all support us in spite of our occasional starry eyes. (And believe me, this assurance comes only after a meltdown on my part where I may or may not have said, "I'm that foolish person they always talk about in the Bible!" There was anguish and gnashing of teeth and everything.) Wrestling is painful and gut-wrenching.

After making this decision, we rushed to our 3:00 appointment for more soul-searching as conducted by a professional (aka counseling - not really related to above epiphany) and the conversation turned to my frustration with where my career is (or, rather, isn't) going. My frustration with how hard I work and how my worth as a counselor can't be measured by a formulaic job evaluation (or a suitable paycheck, for that matter). Mario (blessed man) asked me what I want to do, ultimately. I said school counseling. He then started talking about networking, about how I need to sell myself, etc. I started thinking about how difficult and awkward that sounds (albeit necessary)...then I started thinking about something Mario had said earlier...about private practice. About how he found a lot of freedom in that. And I recalled how I had thought in the past how good he has it - not having to deal with bureaucrazy (misspelling accidental but totally appropriate), insurance companies, etc. About how at the age of 16 I had read Reviving Ophelia and decided that I wanted to be a psychologist who works with depressed teenage girls and how that was what started all these shenanigans in the first place.

On the walk back out to the car, Josh said, "What are you thinking?" And I replied, "Don't talk. I'm thinking."

Truth was, I wasn't just thinking. I was listening. Realllllly listening for the first time in awhile. I was asking God if I need to alter my path a little, if I need start pursuing my original ambition. And I got kind of excited.

I don't know where this will lead, but my outlook, attitude, and list of possibilities is changing. Prayers, please...or, as Diane would say, have a little talk with Tiger for me.

::

On a lighter note, I've been watching a lot of 80s sitcoms on TV today. Almost on purpose...Little House on the Prairie, Full House, Family Matters, and now Roseanne (something tells me it's time to find something else to do). A number of thoughts came to mind:

+ Poor Uncle Jesse with the pink bunnies on the wall!
+ I'm so glad that I don't have to call my mother in law something like Mother Winslow
+ I wonder what young Judy Winslow is doing with her career these days?

A quick search of imdb.com told me that Young Judy Winslow had a foray into hardcore pornography, which saddened me greatly. I then read her bio, which told me that she has since walked away from it and is once again pursuing a legitimate acting career and religion, which made me happy.

Right. Must find something else to do. Signing off.

Unlikely, but true...

2007-08-10T20:10:00.001-04:00

I am addicted to this show. Watch it, and watch it often. Holy cow.

MA-MA

2007-08-01T23:13:00.000-04:00

Mommy Dearest turns 62 today. I'll bet you didn't know this about her...

10. When Mom was a kid, her little sister (Aunt Candy) gave all her dolls away to the neighbor girls. My mother still brings this up.

9. She can't whistle. I inherited this from her.

8. My mom smoked for several years in her 20s. She gave it up cold turkey as a wedding gift for my dad.

7. Mama Bear was born exactly two weeks before V-J Day, or the end of WWII in Japan.

6. My grandpa was not present for my mom's birth, as he was stationed in Kansas or someplace equally boring.

5. My mom makes the best snickerdoodles around. Just ask honorary Russell daughter Kym. My mom once drove to Kalamazoo on a weekday night to surprise me with a fresh batch of snickerdoodles. Kym was in on it. It was fabulous.

4. My mom has slowly turned into my grandmother over the past several years. The hallmark of this phenomenon is regular usage of the phrase, "Oh, for heaven's sake!" This is sometimes accompanied by collecting an entire wardrobe of Alfred Dunner apparel - my mom has not yet reached this pinnacle.

3. When I was a kid and my mom would take me shopping (always at JC Penney or Sears...ALWAYS), I never wanted to try on clothes. Mom's response was to say with cheesy enthusiasm, "Oh, come on. Just for fun." Don't ask me why, but it worked.

2. As a child I did not require much discipline - I feared Mom's disapproval a great deal. You'd never know to look at her that she could be so intimidating.

1. For a brief time we were able to share both clothes and shoes...until I got to fifth grade and became taller than her.

Happy Birthday, Mom! Love you!

A day late...

2007-07-31T18:36:00.000-04:00

And more than a dollar short. Yesterday two of my favorite boys turned a year older...

Preston is three, and as you can see, his birthday was very much orange (and Diego). Five things you may not know about Presto-Chango:

5. Preston once said that he didn't like Uncle Josh. Why? "He's bad." What did he do? "He hit me." When? "After school." The kid is full of it on all fronts. He loves his birthdaymate Uncle Josh.

4. Even though at three years old he is a very big boy, Preston cannot go to bed without at least two pluggies and a sippy cup of warm milk.

3. Preston is only willing to eat the following: hotdogs, tater tots, and apples. It is not unusual to find, in random spots such as the refrigerator or on a chair, an abandoned apple with a few tiny bites taken out of it.

2. Preston is very smart. It is rumored that he has memorized the entire Gettysburg Address.

1. Preston's favorite response to any question is, "Sure!"

It was also Josh's 32nd birthday. Here's 10 things you may not know about Josh:

10. Josh is ambivalent about the color orange.

9. Josh has recently learned that he has a gluten intolerance. Last night he got a gluten-free cake made from wonderful things like sweet rice flour, tapioca flour, and xanthan gum.

8. Josh also has an intolerance to caffiene. He can't even drink decaf coffee. He has to buy this very expensive "coffee" made from chicory root, carob, and other fine wholesome ingredients.

7. Josh has an assortment of Star Wars action figures lined up on a bookshelf in our office. Also in our office? A life-sized Luke Skywalker cardboard cutout.

6. Josh does a dead-on impersonation of Milton Waddams.

5. Several years ago, Josh wrote and had a role in a locally-produced feature-length film. During filming, the set was swarmed by the GRPS SWAT team and he was commanded to lay on the ground with his hands over his head. No kidding.

4. Much like Preston, Josh likes to rock out.

3. Josh is surprised by how much he likes his Torts class. I may end up being the wife of an ambulance chaser.

2. Josh has been to China three times and obtained a very realistic fake Rolex Submariner during his last excursion.

1. Josh loves The West Wing. He owns all seven seasons and falls asleep watching it every night. The show even inspired him to make up his own dance, which he calls "Disc Two." Someday when I'm stealthy enough I'll film him doing it and post it on here for y'all.

Tomorrow's post? You guessed it...another birthday.

Little Lainey Lou, she's not quite two...

2007-07-27T23:13:00.000-04:00

...but today, she's one!

Five little-known facts about our niece and goddaughter, Lainey:

5. She has quite the extensive vocabulary. Two of her favorite words are "baby" and "kitty."

4. Lainey doesn't much care for fruit. She would much rather eat a jar of squash.

3. Lainey loves kitties, especially the family cat, Nedwin. Ned is a good sport and lets Lainey poke, prod, and pull on him mercilessly.

2. Lainey LOVES Shrek and can watch the entire movie with rapt attention in a single sitting.

1. Lainey absolutely hates it when you wear a hat or other head accessory. She will start crying the minute she sees you and will shun you for hours after you've removed the offending item.

Next on the birthday docket we have Preston and Uncle Josh...both on Monday.

Hopefully Josh is okay with having an orange birthday. (Or a Diego birthday...whatever.)

And as for the shiner on Preston's right eye...we're not sure what happened. His story was rather inconsistent. From what we can tell, it involved the kid next door, Connor, and either a car, a golf club, or a baseball bat. Yowch. Preston had a bad week in the face department, given that on Sunday morning he put a YoGo up his nose at big brother Evan's request. Moral of the story? Don't do what Evan tells you to.

Confirmation...

2007-07-14T11:48:00.000-04:00

Photos of the evidence...purple wall, indeed.

2007-07-10T22:18:00.000-04:00

Oh Preston.
Preston Elijah.
How silly you are.

As a little background - my nephew Preston has only been to my house once and probably doesn't remember it. Sometimes he asks me about where Uncle Josh and I live, and I tell him it's far away.

Fast forward to tonight - my mother in law (bless her) calls me as I am having dinner with my mom in Portland, MI (undeniably far away from my usual locale) and tells me that Preston wants to talk to me. Apparently while babysitting him tonight, they'd been sitting out on the front porch and he'd started listing off all the people he loves. Then he got to me "I love Aunt Laura" and decided he needed to give me a ring. Smart kid.

So he gets on the phone and is very, very insistent that I come over tonight to watch Shrek with him.

So I explain, "Oh honey, I'm sorry, I can't...I'm really far away right now and I can't come there tonight." To which he replies, "Well, when you're done at your house come over here and watch Shrek."

(This connection did not dawn on me until just a few minutes ago, mind you.)

Then I again explain that I am very, very far away and I by the time I got there, he would be in bed. He says (very earnestly), "No, I'm not going to bed yet." I hear some talking in the background, and he says, very matter-of-fact, "Grandma says I'm going to bed soon."

So apparently then I was told that I am going to come over tomorrow night to watch Shrek.

Preston will turn three later this month.
And his birthday is going to be orange. (Or so he keeps telling us.)

PS - What's the place where Shrek lives? Far Far Away? HMMMMMM...

Movin' on up....

2007-07-01T20:33:00.000-04:00

...but not sure where yet. Josh and I have a realtor, we have a good faith estimate, and every reason to believe we'll get approved for a mortgage, for which we'll apply soon. We've been scouting out houses on GRAR. We're kinda excited. We're also prepared to possibly not find anything we want in our price range and make our apartment work for awhile longer. It hasn't been that momentous of a step yet, but it feels a lot better to have a couple of professionals in our court, understand the process a little better, and have a much better idea of what we can actually afford, y'know? We'll probably wind up with something relatively small and meager, but it will be OURS - we'll be able to get a dog. We'll be able to paint the walls purple if we want (because I certainly don't know anyone else with a purple wall in their house). We'll get a tax deduction...even if it isn't this kind just yet.

Speaking of that kind, congrats to my good friends Liz and Jeff. Liz was a good friend in college who helped get me through some...uhhh...interesting Russian Culture classes (we learned a LOT about this guy) and shared my profound affinity for fine cinema. Today they welcomed two new little he-Wierengas - Gibson Donald and Henry Daniel. Here are the official publicity photos:

Aren't they lovely? Laura might have to make a stop out in Clarksville before long to say hello. Additionally, Mama and Papa are about to celebrate their 4th anniversary on July 4 - that was one schweet wedding. We all got little pies as favors. Great theme, guys.

That's all for now...you'll know more as we know more!

Oh, sweet Jesus

2007-05-21T23:15:00.000-04:00

I really mean it. Jesus is sweet and beautiful and lovely.

Some photos of this evening's festivities:

We've been through some gut-wrenching emotion over here at Mikrut Central lately, much of which has resulted from a certain final grade that did not correctly reflect a certain amount of studiousness on the subject of Torts. I won't go into that so much, because today was a much better day. I get a phone call from my boy, who informs me that another of his grades has posted, and he'd gotten an A- in Contracts.

Huge. Freakin'. Victory.

The boy is exuberant. He's thrilled. His faith in himself has been restored. He tells me that prior to calling me, he ran around the house and shrieked like Macaulay Culkin. (Don't you just love the imagery?) Although when you think about it, Mac's shrieking was not so much from joy as it was Aqua Velva, but whatever.

I found JOSH confetti at Meijer. Life doesn't get much better than this.

Sooo...

2007-04-29T21:46:00.000-04:00

So I gave up blogging/myspace/instant messaging/etc for Lent. I had intended to write about it when I returned, and I'd intended to return much sooner than this. I just wasn't inspired. So instead I've been lurking - reading your blogs and commenting, but contributing nothing of my own to the (cyber)world. Sorry 'bout that, but oh well. Deal. :)

Tonight I finally convinced Josh to try Yahtzee, which he had NEVER PLAYED IN HIS LIFE. Seriously - how does one get through nearly 32 years in a developed nation without knowing how to play Yahtzee? Anyway, he caught on quickly but had bad luck. He then taught me chess and poker.

I would like to state, for the record, that I whooped ol' boy's butt in 2 games of Yahtzee, five card stud, and seven card stud. Unfortunately, his bishop checkmated my king. Grrr.

Another interesting component of my day...I was drugg'd. As some background, I am a lifelong sufferer of these horrific cramps in my feet, the kind where two of your toes clamp together and curl downward. It hurts like crazy. I've been told to take potassium supplements, calcium supplements, drink lots of water, and stretch my feet on a regular basis. Do you think any of this helps? 'Course not. (Why should my body work like it's supposed to?) Anyway, last night I was just starting to drop off at 2 a.m. when all of a sudden - searing, painful spasm in m'left foot. I got up and stretched it every which way I could think of. I put on my fleece "booty socks." I wrapped my foot in a heating pad on the highest setting. (I should take this opportunity to point out that the two latter actions have great possibility of making things worse, as they require some degree of pointing my toe.) Anyway, nothing was working, and Grumpy Sleepy Josh muttered, "WHY do you keep wiggling around???" So I said screw it and retrieved one of Josh's Flexeril (sp?) tablets out of the medicine cabinet. Now, I know it's illegal to take someone else's prescription (so SHHHH). And I knew full well that these fine muscle relaxers would make me a zombie all day today.

I was a zombie all day today. But at least I didn't get arrested.

So even though I zoned out a lot at church, dozed off on the couch at Josh's grandma's this afternoon, and didn't get any of my rapidly-coming-due paperwork done for my day job, that's okay. IT WAS WORTH IT.

To paraphrase a song from this morning - I'd like to love my feet to heaven. Or at least a perpetually relaxed state.

So now, Sleepy Rubber Cement Girl is off to bed.

Signing off (or TTFN in KateSpeak)

2007-02-20T21:17:00.000-05:00

Well, friends, I must bid you adieu for awhile...not that I haven't done it before (and certainly much less ceremoniously and out of pure posting laziness)...but when challenged by Mars Hill, myself, God, and Diane (most notably Diane) what I would be giving up for Lent, I rolled the question over in my mind. As I asked myself, "What unhealthy thing needs to be less present in your life?" an answer quickly came to mind. (It was, incidentally, the same thing that Diane suggested...Diane, you are a prophet!) Could I do it? Could I give it up entirely? Do I ultimately want to change this part of my life? The answers were yes, no, and yes.

I am giving up the Information Superhighway for Lent.

(You know you love it, Anne. I love it too!)

Not entirely, though. I do need to use it for work, and there is critical information I get via e-mail (regarding bills, important social events, etc). I should mention here that a big reason that I want to do this is that I need to better develop my social life here in GR and I spend way too much time on cyber-socialization. And it's not good for me at. all. So if this is my goal, why would I want to risk missing out on movie nights, k-nitting parties, Law School Oscars Night Parties, and the like? Right. E-mail's not my problem.

MySpace is. Blogger is (even though I rarely post, I spend way too much time reading others' posts and checking back to see if there are any new posts). Facebook is. IKEA.com is. Random surfing for the purpose of random surfing is. Instant Messenger is. So these are the things I will be giving up. (Realize here that I am going out on a limb to admit my obscene nerdiness...)

I can do e-mail, I can do work for my job, I can read some news as long as I don't spend too much time on it. I can shop if there is something that I need to buy and I know I can buy it at a particular website.

But that's it. No more.

I am praying that my Lenten journey brings me better time management, more time actually interacting with people in person, and more time for spiritual matters. Oh, and maybe I'll actually get off my duff and go work out.

AND, in a funny (and Diane-esque) turn of events, my computer decided to crash on Saturday. I mean crashed. Windows has gone belly-up. Gotta call the IT guy to come nurse it back to health and *hopefully* I won't lose all my music, photos, and all the papers I've written since my freshman year of college. Seriously, if that wasn't a sign, what is?

So I won't be leaving you all witty comments for awhile. (For that I am truly sorry, for I am a funny funny woman.) You can leave me comments if you like, as I will be able to moderate them from my e-mail, but I won't be responding. If you want to communicado con yo, e-mail me. (laura[dot]mikrut[at]gmail[dot]com)...or you can call me and say, "Hey Laura, in honor of your boycott of the internet, let's go to the arcade and play some Pong." (Seriously...I would do it. I'm not above Pong.) You all know my number.

So I will be seeing you on Easter Sunday...or mabye after that. I might be perfectly happy to stay off the grid by that point.

PS - I'm also giving up pop. It's not good for ya, yo. But I'm not giving up WHAM! (That one's just for you, Kate.)

Hearts and flowers rings and vows (rings and vows!)

2007-02-14T21:37:00.000-05:00

You'd better have been singing that to the tune of "Heads and Shoulders Knees and Toes." Don't make me get all corporal on you.

Today is V-day, of course. I never put THAT much stake in it, but I am a girl and thus always thought it would be nice to have a lovely person to share the Hallmark holiday with.

That didn't usually happen for me, which was just as well. My friends and I celebrated in a number of ways over the years. In college Kym and I started the AVD parties (Anti-Valentine's Day for those of you not possessing the gift of acronymical intuition)...these celebrations took a number of forms. I don't recall which came first, but it always involved a large gathering of some high school friends and some wholesome activity. There was the time we piled into cars with the mission of doing laser tag. I don't remember why that didn't work out, but I do remember that we wound up at a coffee shop over on the West side of Lansing. The best part about that one was making Matt and Emily break up for the evening...they were long-standing high school sweeties, and our rule was that only single people could participate...thus, we told them they had to break up. No touching, no kissing, no riding in the same car. They hated it but wanted too much to be part of the fun to really object. Then there was the time we had the AVD bake-off at Kym's parents' house...we made sugar cookies and decorated them with black frosting in a tube with Xs through hearts and that sort of thing. It was great fun. I have pictures somewhere. There was another year when Kym, Anne, and I shared an elegant dinner. It was like our own little romantic date. I think we even lit candles.

Then there was grad school. Most of the AVD people were long gone - moved away to faraway states, gotten married, fallen out of touch, etc. About four years ago Melissa (middle school friend), her roommate Suzanne (our favorite tree-hugging vegetarian) and I had a fun-filled rendezvous that gave a whole new meaning to V-Day. We made tacos with vegetarian taco "meat" (V #1 is for vegetarian). Then we went up to campus for a special V-day performance of the Vagina Monologues. (I don't think I need to tell you that there's a second V there!) Then, on the way home, Melissa and I were riding in her old beloved Ford Probe (otherwise known as the Anal Probe) when "All That She Wants" by WHAM! came on the radio, and of course we had to car dance. We laughed until we cried and it henceforth became known as the Vagina Dance (its moniker deriving ENTIRELY from the show we'd just been to, don't get any funny ideas, people). Not too long thereafter I found the album at CD Warehouse and it's been one of my favorite songs ever since. I love you, Closeted George Michael.

Fast forward to two years ago. I had met Josh. I had a bona fide boy in my life who I had, by that point, had decided was a keeper (THE keeper, in fact). He stretched V-Day into a week, leaving me little clues and notes around my apartment (one being in my dictionary because we're both nerdy like that). He snuck into my office when I didn't even know he was in town and left these on my desk:

Sweet boy.

Here's us a few days thereafter - look how happy we were, flush with all the joys of new love (including Josh's lopsided smile, compliments of Bell's Palsy):

Last year? We were going insane putting together the final details for our wedding...only four days to go. We decided that Valentine's Day didn't really need to involve a big fuss, so we decided to go low-key and have a Big Fat Mars Hill Wedding.

This year? Several ideas got thrown around, including having two holidays in one, having a romantic Valentine's-like holiday in the summer instead...at one point this involved tears on my end (because despite all my practicality, I am a GIRL)...we came to a decision, and then things morphed in their own way despite our plans...last night Josh came home with a dozen roses, a bag of Valentine's peanut M&Ms, and V-Day socks. I gave him a Reese's Peanut Butter Heart (a big one, mind you) and a Tamale Pie dinner kit he'd had his eye on. Then I caved and gave him his anniversary gifts too - an iPod armband for the gym (he learned his lesson after dropping his on the treadmill) and a new gym bag. (Maybe I was sending him mixed messages with the fattening candy and the gym paraphenalia?) Valentine's Day is February 14th. Our first anniversary is the 18th. We did much of our celebrating last night...although we're going to fancy dinner and symphony on Friday and at some point this weekend we'll eat our (most likely freezerburned) anniversary cake, bust out our gorgeous crystal toasting flutes, and drink the duty-free Korbel champagne we bought on our cruise. I just love that we bought champagne in St. Thomas that we could've gotten at Meijer. So exotic. Oh well. Here's a final parting picture for you all:

Thus Endeth The History Of Valentine's Day by Laura Russell Mikrut. (This is where you sarcastically say, "Good story, Grandpa! Tell it again!")

Happy V-Day to you, however you choose to celebrate.

Mi esposo es MUY divertido

2007-01-28T19:30:00.000-05:00

Picture it: Gaines Township, 2007. Josh is engrossed in Back to the Future 3 on AMC (which, may I add, he JUST WATCHED LAST WEEK). Laura wanders into the room.

Laura: I want to learn to knit. (k-nit for those of you whose gates swing that way)
Josh (distractedly): Well, um...you have the genetic disposition...and the right source material...

Source material??? Does he speak of ore and wood? Are we playing Settlers of Catan today?

She got me!

2007-01-28T09:42:00.000-05:00

Diane, that is. Thanks, for tagging me, friend!

Five random, little-known facts about me:

1. I can't whistle. (No elaboration needed on that one.)

2. Since I graduated from high school nine years ago, I haven't lived in any one place longer than 13 consecutive months. I have been living here for 12 months. I'm getting crazy antsy and have been looking for houses on grar.com and even for other apartments, despite the fact that we just renewed our lease. (Two years in one place? What will I DO?) Somebody smack me upside the head and tell me that I already have a perfectly good place to live. Sheesh.

3. Seeing an inappropriately placed apostrophe makes my skin crawl. I'm a spelling and grammar nazi too, but I've made the apostrophes my own special cause.

4. Last night, I won my first game of Scrabble. Ever. (For the record, I also won Boggle - I was a word maniac!)

5. When I was in elementary school, I read the Little House books obsessively. Of course, it helped that my name was already Laura...all I needed was a long skirt with a petticoat. The closest I could get was a knee-length magenta skirt that was quite full. One summer I wore it every. single. day. (Whether or not it matched anything else I was wearing!)

Okay, your turn...Anne, Rudi, Marie, Chris, Tracy...go! (But seriously, Tracy...only if you have time!)

La la la...

2007-01-04T21:34:00.000-05:00

...I'm back. Sorta. Anne reminded me that I haven't posted in awhile, and I must admit she's right. But I have been thinking about it. I'm just lazy. So here's the thing...I'm going to blog about yesterday.

My first day at my new job.

My very exciting first day.

At my lovely, wonderful new job.

But not now.

Why?

I have to figure out how to get my Bluetooth to work so that I can send some pictures from my phone to my computer.

Because they're worth seeing, and fully explain the excitement of the day.

My new office is on Lake Drive, and that's all I'm gonna say.

Busy as bees are we!

2006-11-09T23:04:00.000-05:00

Flurry of activity over here lately...

Laura:
1. Going to seminars, conferences, and other professional development-type events.
2. Madly finishing internship hours (5 weeks left!)
3. Have taken on a contract job with the Kent ISD to recruit students at my secondary school placement for an afterschool tutoring/credit recovery program. Fortunately, some of these hours overlap with internship hours (but with money!)
4. Applying for jobs (two in last two days, perhaps another tomorrow)
5. Trying to remember to do laundry (failing miserably, aside from non-essential laundry: case in point - washing and ironing of duvet cover as opposed to crucial underwear washing)
6. Ruminating about progress on wedding thank yous - it's not that we're not grateful, we REALLY are! It's just so hard when EVERYTHING is a priority...but we will send them, and they will be overflowing with love and gratitude for the ways everyone gave of themselves for us.
7. Operation TightBudget - need I say more?
8. Trying to fit social things into the calendar, such as Beneath The Wreath with Anne and Marnee last month
9. We traveled most weekends in October and it was exhausting.

Josh:

1. Applying for law school with plans to start in January
2. Prepping for second taking of LSAT on December 2nd - his first score wasn't bad, but we're shooting for more scholarship money.
3. Finishing three incompletes from master's degree - two in the form of retaking the classes, one in the form of finishing that last paper...
4. Working at Carrabba's 3-4 nights per week (although he is taking a 3-week hiatus for LSAT prep)
5. Operation TightBudget - hey, let's not pretend it's only affecting one of us!
6. Organizing a cover band and having fairly regular reunions with former band MilitantPoet.
7. Also lots of traveling weekends in October
8. Mars Hill worship team commitments

We're running a race here, people, and in many ways we're near the end...and yet also near the beginning of another! We would love some extra love and prayers! That I can manage to wear clean clothes to work...that Josh have focused time for LSAT prep...that he scores better on this test...that I figure out all the irritating and confusing details surrounding the licensures I'm seeking...that I find a JOB...that we both get good sleep and nutrition...and maybe even some time for exercise. Also, if you could throw in an extra bonus prayer, we are really hoping to not have to deal with any car troubles until I am working again!

So if you wondered where I have been, or have been wondering how we're doing...there you go! Love and miss you all - we promise to emerge into the world again sometime soon!

...

2006-10-31T19:58:00.000-05:00

I know that I haven't posted in awhile. I know that I probably have all sorts of interesting things to share with you...like spending a day snuggling into a featherbed in a room at the Grand Traverse Resort (with a killer view of the bay, mind you) while enjoying a room-service quesadilla with J-Dogg. Like getting tipsy on cosmos with Mrs. Falicki this weekend and having a good ol' time in D-town. Like going to the Michigan School Counselors Association annual conference Sunday and Monday. Like going to the dentist today for the fourth time since getting my fillings in May because it hurts to bite down on crunchy things (and subsequently finding out that there was an air pocket in one of my fillings - got that taken care of).

Instead, however, I would like to make one solitary statement:

John Kerry, your statements today have done nothing but remind me once again why I did NOT vote for you. Apologize to the troops, for they are the people you insulted. (Let it be known that I would love to throw around some choice words here, but we're running a family-friendly show.)

The End. Enjoy the rest of your evening.

At Diane's request...

2006-10-19T21:39:00.000-04:00

Thank you, my friend, for reminding me that it has now been officially over a month since I posted!

Yesterday was my birthday. Yes, indeed, I am 27...officially in my Upper Twenties. (Or, as Sera Kitty would say, Halfway To Fifty Four.) Lovely gifts, lovely cake, lovely burritos, lovely in-laws to celebrate with. I got two (2) pairs of Halloween socks. Josh and I are going to Traverse City this weekend to a) celebrate birthday; and b) commemorate engagement which happened this time last year. We'll go to my old church on Sunday and hopefully I can introduce him to my kindergarten teacher. Mrs. Good will just love him, I am sure!

Today I taught. Yes, that's right, got up in front of kids and fed their minds. Who'da thunk? I actually enjoyed it! (And so did they!) The teachers were very complimentary and said I did a great job - a much-needed professional ego boost. We made collages about ourselves and shared them with the class in the hopes that these kids will learn to appreciate each other's differences and quit throwing racial slurs at each other. This poor school needs so much love and understanding. It's amazing how nasty trailer park culture can be and how it affects these poor kids. There's one girl I see who has turbulent friendships with several of the other kids. Why? Because her mother gets in fights with THEIR parents, they all call the cops on each other, etc. Poor things. I wish they could understand how much better it could be.

I've decided that I need to lay off the news for awhile. The world is so unbelievably depressing to me right now. Madonna infuriates me with her adoption. (Why couldn't she financially sponsor the family so this boy could return to his father? Why leave him alone with her staff his FIRST NIGHT at her home?) I am still grieving the recent school shootings (especially the Amish one). I am utterly and thoroughly convinced that video games are one of the main causes of the recent surge of violence in adolescents (don't ever buy them for your kids). Josh suggested we join the Amish. I pointed out that neither of us would adjust well, what with our overeducated worldviews and propensity to drop four-letter words. He agreed. But it WOULD be nice. These people know what they're doing. They get it. There's something to be said for a simpler way of life. A communal way of life. A life of quiet joys. A life of utter dependence on God and your community. A life free of garbage, clutter, and overstimulation.

In short - no news. No Madonna. No staying up too late playing with my gadgets. More time sharing time with others. For awhile.

In other, unrelated news, I got two new pairs of jeans tonight. They fit me. They were only $30 apiece. (I wish I were in Britain so that I could say they cost me 30 quid.) I bought them with a gift card I got for my birthday. My jeans situation was, until today, quite hopeless...the one pair I had that fit JUST TODAY got a hole in a very unflattering region. So for all my talk of living a simpler, less commercialized life, thank you, God, for your divine hand of good fit and price during my JC Penney experience this evening.

I have a final request...Josh should be getting his LSAT score sometime in the next four days. We are not worried about him getting into law school...what hangs in the balance is how much scholarship money he'll get. His practice test scores very consistently put him in the range for a 75% scholarship, and one score was very close to what he would need for a 100% scholarship. I'm asking you all to pray for blessings on this score...that it will serve Josh well and help meet our financial needs. That would be fantastic, friends. Thank you.

Tomorrow...college trip to Ferris with the high schoolers! YESSSSSS! Free lunch! School bus ride! Maybe I can get them all to sing 'The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air' with me...

This post may well cost me a job someday...oh well.

2006-09-18T21:42:00.000-04:00

Okay, so I really wanted to post the entirety of this conversation here, as it is most hysterical...but given that it was full of expletives and we're running a family-friendly show here, I shall provide only the final, culminating remarks, which caused big fat laughter tears on my end. Just know that it involved my rationale for wanting to send our kids to private school and the mention of pizza with dessert square.

Melissaloon (9:34:09 PM): The meap test is making our children fat
Melissaloon (9:34:23 PM): someone should tell dateline

I hope you think it's funny. It is. Melissa, you are my Soul Mate of Funny. PiPi loves her Sugar.

A mixed bag

2006-09-09T00:07:00.000-04:00

Up and down this evening. I left school this afternoon with the intention of going home, as my less-than-five-hours-of-sleep last night had left me dragging all day and totally unmotivated to go to the Y (as previously planned). I am happy to report that somewhere on Burton between Clyde Park and the 131 South ramp, I decided I was going. And go I did. I lifted and worked my abs. I showed the elliptical trainer who was boss. I watched "What Not to Wear." All those endorphins must've brought on some euphoria, because I belted out some Mars Hill tunes from the new CD whilst in the car (not that that is so unusual, really) and went to Meijer. Now, here I am, all exercised and healthful, and I go to town on the produce section. I immediately noticed that the strawberries were on sale and was, literally, OVERJOYED to buy them. I bought cucumbers. Acorn squash. Spaghetti squash. Whole grain english muffins. An inordinate supply of little boxes of raisins. Then I left (after being very genuinely friendly and cheery with the U-Scan attendant - when have I ever done that?), daydreaming about the dinner of tilapia, squash, and spring mix I was going to make myself. Saying to myself, "Ugh, why would I want something rich and sweet and chocolatey?"

If you don't exercise, think about it. It's amazing how it really makes you crave what it is that your body ACTUALLY wants and needs.

Now, though...maybe it's the 4.75 hours of sleep. Probably. But right now I'm just feeling, well, a bit hostile and bitter. Not for any good reason, either. I won't even go into the ridiculous thoughts that have been swirling through my head, because they deserve no credence. They're lies.

Sorry. Hope that was somewhat lucid and not too cryptic. I've concluded that it's bedtime, and some NyQuil just might be in order :)

I should be doing laundry.

2006-09-02T13:56:00.000-04:00

A is for age:
Ask me again in 46 days, when I will be:

B is for beer of choice:
Corona. With a lime. With fun people. Otherwise, beer is pointless.

C is for career:
School Counseling. Just getting into my internship right now. Let's hope I find a job come December!

D is for:
Donna Summer.

E is for essential item you use everyday:
Underwear. Yup, you heard me.

F is for favorite TV show at the moment:
Kyle XY. It's a rare gem on the ABC Family lineup.

G is for favorite game:
Apples to Apples...it's time for another smackdown. I found one of Spencer's A 2 A Junior cards in my car yesterday. Who wants to play?

I is for instruments you play:
iTunes? Does that count? :)

K is for whose butt you'd like to kick:
Business owners who incorrectly use apostrophes on their business signs. HELLO??? Your sign is a major business investment, and do you really want it to communicate that you can't pass 8th grade English? Yeah, that's right, Taco's Ortega and Hunan Garden's, I'm talking to you.

L is for last place you ate:
My big green monster chair. You mean restaurant? Well, we got Lebanese takeout from Shawarma King in Kzoo yesterday and it was FABULOUS. We had Shish Tawook, which is pictured here:

N is for your full name:
Laura Percival Mikrut. Not really.

O is for overnight hospital stays:
Never! Muahahahaha. I've never even been admitted.

P is for people you were with today:
My new hairstylist, Maecey (yes, Anne, that's really how she spelled it!) and of course Joshu.

Q is for quote:
"Damn! We're in a tight spot!" (Ten points to whoever comments first with the movie that quote is from.)

R is for Biggest Regret:
It's really stupid and petty and not worth mentioning here...wedding-detail-related. (And no, it's not Josh!)

S is for status:
I am seated, thank you for asking.

T is for time you woke up today:
7:15-ish? Way too early for a childless person on a Saturday, but I had an 8:30 haircut.

U Is for where did U go?
No, I believe that U is actually for U-Haul, and I won't be needing one this summer, thanks for asking.

V is for vegetable that you love:
Broccoli, it's the only one I'll eat these days.

W is for worst habit:
Where do you want me to start? I think my procrastination covers most of them.

X is for x-rays you've had:
My toofers, of course, and a back x-ray at the Chiropractor, and I had a chest x-ray and EEG when I was 16 because I was having weird chest pains. And, of course, the occasional one at the airport:

Y is for yummy food you ate today:
Nothing particularly yummy so far. The Kashi Good Friends with Light Silk soymilk was pretty good, I guess.

Z is for zodiac sign:
Mine, or just any one in general? Can't we think of something more creative here? Like Zoo animal? Or your opinion of U2's Zooropa album? (Verdict: very good.)

I'm boycotting society.

2006-08-24T17:36:00.000-04:00

It's true.

I've had enough.

This has something to do with my envy of Kate and her pregnant self (track with me here a second). Not because I wish to be pregnant. Not at the moment, anyway. I envy her because IF people are bold enough to ask her if she is pregnant (which is always a no-no, by the way - ARE YOU LISTENING?), she can happily answer "Yes, isn't life a miracle?" and not have to say, "No, I'm not, but apparently I look like I am." Creates awkwardness and all kinds of insecurity. Satan. It's Satan. When you have the urge to ask a woman if she is pregnant, be aware that you will be acting on behalf of Lucifer himself.

It's true.

I guess this means that I will also continue my boycott of Satan.

SERIOUSLY PEOPLE!!!! I do not look it! I certainly do not look anywhere near close enough to warrant being asked this TWO TIMES in the last six months.

Here's how today's conversation went:

Innocent Laura: I need to go to Babies R Us to get a shower gift.
Unwitting Agent of Satan: Are you expecting?
IL: [Thinks: That's odd.] Oh, no!
UAoS: Oh, well I asked because you have a little bit of a tummy.

WHAT??? WHAT???
She shoulda left it alone. I would have just assumed that she didn't hear the part about needing to buy a shower gift. BUT NOOOOO...and unlike the last culprit, I can't excuse her based on her being from another continent and thus perhaps ignorant of such cultural taboos. Whatever.

Point is, I'm not pregnant. But Erin is, and I will be going to her shower this evening.

Then I'll be spending a lot of time at the Y and eating iceberg lettuce and water popsicles a la DJ Tanner.

Reason #42 why being a newlywed boosts your confidence

2006-08-17T23:23:00.000-04:00

Laura: Why's the fridge open?
Josh: I opened it to get a Canada Dry, but then I saw your butt.

Random (but fabulous) photo slideshow!

2006-08-11T01:43:00.000-04:00

Of course I'll sit with the kids.

2006-08-11T00:09:00.000-04:00

Although (try as I may) Geico has NEVER saved me money on my car insurance, I love the commercials, especially these last few weeks. Especially this one. He's so conversational.

Presenting...

2006-08-04T22:31:00.000-04:00

...Elaina Marie Mikrut!

[But please, call her Lainey.]

Whatta peanut! She's adorable! We all love her!

I feel a bit bad that I have been so remiss in posting this in a timely manner...she's eight days old already. But pish posh. Cuteness is cuteness, no matter how late.

And, because I couldn't resist...here's a photo of Lainey being held by Preston, the youngest of her three big brothers, who just turned two on Sunday:

Oh, the cute. I just can't handle all these fine-lookin' children.

Further evidence that my husband is a nerd...

2006-07-11T00:41:00.000-04:00

Perhaps if you are a male acquaintance of Josh's, you've been propositioned by him to play this game:

If he's bugged you about it, I'm sorry. But I will say that thus far, everyone who has played it with him likes it and wants to play again. Last night we trekked up to Rockford to the home of Josh's bro Adam and his fine family expressly for this purpose. Honorary family member Nathan Hinkley and his new wife Marci came too. Sarah, Marci, and I had bonding time while Adam, Josh, and Nate played the game (with one of the LOTR films playing on the giant computer monitor nearby, no less). Spencer wanted to join in too, and I'm glad they let him in on it...he loves playing games with the grown-ups. He was up way past his bedtime.

As were we all. Us ladies preferred to go get ice cream and watch Memoirs of a Geisha. Gorgeous film.

During our dinner of steak, merlot, and margaritas, Adam and Sarah asked Josh and I to be the godparents of the baby girl who will be joining us in just two weeks. Hurrah! After immediately accepting, Josh said, "I was wondering how many kids you'd have before it was my turn!" Now there's even more reason to be excited! Bring on the baby!

Laura's Experiments with Hypertext!

2006-07-06T21:58:00.000-04:00

Ah, friends.

I have a job for a bit. I answer phones and take service orders so that friendly shopkeepers statewide can get help if their deli salad bars and beer caves are running a bit warmer than normal/experiencing condensation/need new door gaskets. I enter purchase order information into the computer and get to input words like "capacitator," which makes me want to don an Einstein-like wig and exclaim, "Great Scot!"

I must admit, the office decor reminds me of things like soprano saxophones, a young Macaulay Culkin, and the color mauve. When I walk into the building, it's like magically appearing in 1991 (am I sensing a theme here?) Read: archaic business equipment whose once-putty-colored plastic exteriors have yellowed considerably. I heard dot-matrix printing on more than one occasion today. The main computer program *technically* operates on Windows, but what's within that window looks and acts suspiciously like DOS...

In other news, I started my class. I could go look at my syllabus to find the exact title, but it goes something like this: "Literacy Strategies for the Primary Grades." Yup. I'm being taught how to teach kids to read. Which isn't bad in and of itself, except that I am the ONLY non-teacher in the classroom, most of the other students are getting their masters in READING and LITERACY, my prof is herself a fourth-grade teacher, and everyone shows off how cutely they can write their names with Crayola markers. (Okay, I admit, the last part is kinda fun.) These people speak a lingo I have no knowledge of. They talk about how they've used icky-sounding things such as "Anticipation Grids" in their classrooms. I have to write haikus about the moon for homework. (EVERY DAY.) It's not all bad, of course, but I'm utterly lost half the time. And the well-rested, tan, "I have free time for three months" people on either side of me are starting to lose patience with me and my questions after only the second day.

I don't know how to NOT participate in a class. It's so frustrating.

Good things have come of it, though. I got to read an AMAZING children's book called Black and White by David Macaulay. If you have kids, or know kids, and you would like them to think outside of the box (or if they already do)...give this to them. Let them flip back and forth through the pages. It's an amazing way to tell a story.

I'm also reminded of books that I loved as a wee bitty one: The Jolly Postman...The Little House...My Little Golden Book About God...A Pocket For Corduroy...and, finally, my first chapter book, The Magic Coin.

So, kids, it's off to look at the moon. Later tonight, Josh will come home from some sort of battle of the bands in some hick town near the state line.

Insane.

2006-07-04T12:23:00.000-04:00

Don't ask me how I happened upon this. Just know that the opening sequence is what sold me on posting this here.

Some snacks, goodies, and treats for ya.

2006-06-27T20:21:00.000-04:00

Random tidbits:

1. My good friend Melissa has a "Snacks, Goodies, and Treats Treats Treats" dance. I would try to describe it but nothing I can say would do it justice. When I see her next week I'll try to get her to do it on camera, then I'll post it on YouTube.

2. I'd like to apologize to Chris Dornan for censoring his comment. I am sorry. I hope that this does not threaten this beautiful friendship we call Lauristopher. Hugs not drugs, my friend.

3. I spent my day applying at two different temp agencies today. I was informed that I have really good clerical skills, one of which is my typing speed - 79 wpm. I owe all the credit to AOL Instant Messenger. My high school internet addiction appears to have paid off. (I am sorry to bring up a tender subject...you know who you are.)

4. Due to #3, I have renewed hope that someone might perhaps want to trust me with a job.

5. I am beginning to wonder if telling them they could contact my most recent supervisor was a good idea, as I still do not trust him.

6. That's because I am STILL waiting for my last paycheck. And no one will call me back.

7. Josh perfected Carrabba's Picchi Pacchu recipe this weekend. (Pasta in a tomato-basil sauce topped with Italian-seasoned chicken). It was delicious and fantastic (and made with gluten-free rice pasta, for those of you whose gates swing that way)...we officially invite you over to eat some sometime. Please. Take us up on this offer. We love to have people over. We have a delightful little balcony to chat upon. Another menu option: Mediterranean kabobs with falafel and hummus. It's to die for. Just ask Tim and Lindsey. Except don't ask Lindsey, because I don't think it was her cup o' tea.

8. We officially do not recommend teaching two-year-old boys how one gets Mardi Gras beads. Trust us. Anything you tell them, THEY REPEAT. (We would just like to mention that we were innocent bystanders and showed the proper amount of disapproval at the whole affair.) Good thing little Presto was too distracted by his incoming molar. Honestly, why would you want to corrupt this beautiful little guy? (I have a feeling that Sarah Belcher can guess exactly who the culprit here is! Call it a Godmother's intuition!)

9. This Saturday is the Annual Falicki 4th of July Hoopla on Bostwick Lake. Bring a dish to pass. Not you. Us. Still plotting what that will be. I'm envisioning a casserole of epic proportions. Because nothing says 4th of July like a casserole. I'm looking forward to alternating proclamations of "LAAAARRRRRR!" and "Thank you so much for marrying my friend Josh." I love the boys of militantPoet.

10. Kate has sent her Blogger curse to me...I can't post more than one picture. Ack. Too bad...I had a great pancake picture to post for you, Tracy.

That's all for today, kids...

Coming to the Mikrut living room 8/2/06:

2006-06-15T13:39:00.000-04:00

Because this little guy misses his family:

101 things you've always wanted to know about me

2006-06-15T00:09:00.000-04:00

I am contributing this torrent of information for two reasons, both related to my cousin-in-law (in law) Sarah Belcher...1) She did it, and 2) She thinks I'm a hilarious writer, I'm sure you all think so too, and I aim to please!
1. My middle name is Rose
2. It was my grandma's maiden name, my aunt's middle name, and now my little cousin's middle name.
3. Right now our plan is for all our daughters to have Rose as their middle name.
4. And all the boys get James.
5. I was there when Shannon Uthoff lost her mint chocolate chip virginity.
6. I have gained about 25 lbs since high school.
7. And I haven't even had a baby yet!
8. I was a swimmer in high school.
9. And middle school.
10. I couldn't swim butterfly because of a shoulder injury.
11. I was all about the backstroke.
12. My coach Sean tried to make me a distance swimmer, because that's what he did with all the swimmers who didn't have natural talent.
13. My senior year we figured out that I was actually a pretty decent sprinter.
14. Josh doesn't know much about my swimming years.
15. Like how I once puked in a trash can after practice because practice kicked my ass.
16. And how my nickname was Chia Pet because I grew leg hair like no other.
17. Actually, I think he knows about that.
18. You do know that swimmers can't shave their legs all season, right?
19. Then they shave for the final meet.
20. And swim super fast and slippery-like.
21. It's long been debated whether the cause is physical or psychological.
22. We used to all shave our arms and legs down together in the locker room.
23. It wasn't unusual for me to go through at least 10 razors.
24. Enough about that.
25. I've been through physical therapy at least four times.
26. I have to wear a bite guard at night because I grind my teeth so bad.
27. I only just last year saw Toy Story.
28. I am the palest white person I've ever met.
29. But I've still got soul.
30. That's why Josh calls me the White Chocolate Princess.
31. Sometimes I watch cheesy movies on the religious channel on TV.
32. I only had my driver's permit for two months before I got my license.
33. I wish I wouldn't get so sucked into the internet.
34. I want to make spectacular, high-end beaded jewelry and sell it on etsy.com.
35. I struggle with depression sometimes.
36. I have a hangnail on my pinky and it hurts.
37. My car's name is Patsy, after King Arthur's coconut-banging attendant on "Monty Python and the Holy Grail."
38. My cell phone is navy blue and I love it.
39. I want a new car, and I want it to be a maroon Honda Civic hybrid four-door with a sunroof, gray interior, and a CD player. When I have kids, I want a minivan with stow and go seating.
40. I've messed with Texas.
41. And Texas liked it.
42. I've been to Needles, CA.
43. I wouldn't recommend it.
44. The high altitude at the Grand Canyon makes it hard for me to breathe.
45. I'm getting a new couch on August 2.
46. I wish I had some bananas right now.
47. My maiden name, Russell, is a Scottish nickname for redhead.
48. My brother, two uncles, aunt, and grandma are all redheads.
49. I worked at Wendy's in high school.
50. And yes, I still eat the food.
51. I used to make elephant ears by deep-frying the pita bread and sprinkling cinnamon and sugar on it.
52. Someone brought in a cinnamon and sugar shaker with a little cowboy on the front just for this purpose.
53. My favorite job there was to work the drive-through cash register.
54. I really, really like tater tots.
55. I want to get a chihuahua and name him Jaques.
56. I have a really sensitive metabolism.
57. I secretly look forward to when Josh watches the West Wing, because I'm getting hooked on it too.
58. I didn't have a name until I was two days old.
59. I could have been a Stephanie or an Emily.
60. I agree with Kym that Bravo Italian Cucina makes the Olive Garden look like Fazoli's.
61. I was in at least three different Cherry Festival parades as a child.
62. I took ballet lessons when I was a kid.
63. I still remember how to do all the moves...pirouette, arabesque, grand jete, rond de jobme (sp?) and enjoy practicing them in my own house.
64. I wish I knew how to tap dance.
65. I once had Christmas dinner with someone of great notoriety.
66. Some call him Dr. Death.
67. The first time I met him I was eleven and couldn't figure out why everyone was making such a fuss over him.
68. So I asked my cousin Kerry who he was.
69. She said, "Go ask Grandma who Dr. Death is."
70. So I did.
71. I promptly got a verbal lashing.
72. Yes, I'm talking about Jack Kevorkian.
73. Didn't see him again until I was 17 and he came over to my grandma's for Christmas Dinner.
74. Josh just called and is going to bring me crunchy tacos from Taco Bell.
75. I heart Josh.
76. I was a ridiculous perfectionist as a child.
77. I love vintage ads in poster form.
78. I am now the proud owner of a tent.
79. We're going camping in Grand Haven in August.
80. My friend Melissa and I talked about dressing up as Karen and Rosario for Halloween. I still want to do that. But I still insist upon being Karen. Melissa would look killer in a Members Only jacket.
81. I enjoy watching PBS.
82. I also enjoy watching the Discovery Channel.
83. Also the History Channel.
84. But TLC is my favorite.
85. Only 6 minutes until my Tots are done cooking.
86. I LOVE Napoleon Dynamite. Still. I don't care if it's passe.
87. I also love quirky t-shirts.
88. Josh and I are saving our spare change for a trip to Disney World next spring.
89. The World Showcase at Epcot is my favorite.
90. Epcot was originally an acronym for "Experimental Prototype Community of Tomorrow"
91. I have two friends who work at Disney.
92. I can't wait to have kids.
93. Modernistic commercials are so cheesy...I *almost* like them.
94. I am a bargain-hunter.
95. I also know when to splurge a little on the important stuff. Like our new couch.
96. I just discovered that I like gin and tonics.
97. We're making dinner for Nick and Kristie tonight.
98. I hope that Nick makes me another G&T.
99. I love IKEA.
100. I have seen Radiohead in concert twice - as opening act for Alanis Morissette and REM.
101. My Tots are delicious :)

Turnips.

2006-06-12T21:13:00.000-04:00

What will I be watching tonight? "How to Get the Guy" on ABC. Why? I mean, clearly I've accomplished it...

Because, friends, I see that Teresa Strasser will be hosting. She used to be the host of TLC's "While You Were Out." They ousted her for this cheesy young guy who looks like he should be on Blue's Clues. I was pissed. And she's back! I love this girl! (Girl Crush Alert!)

Thank you all for indulging me.

...aaaaand she's back!

2006-06-12T01:47:00.000-04:00

I didn't realize that I haven't posted since before the wedding. Holy Batman. I'm sorry. Didja miss me? I am, indeed, going to resurrect this blog to chronicle the happenings in my life, including newlywed-dom and unemployment.

Yeah, you heard me. Laura no tengo un job. But it's a good thing. It's a very good thing. If anyone knows of a nice no-brain job I could have for the next two months, would you let me know?

Key events in the Mikrut family over the past 3.5 months (in no particular order):

1. Laura visited foreign countries, none of which were Canada. Monumental.
2. We found out that Josh's SIL Sarah is having a baby girl in July! WAY monumental. Sarah will finally have someone to help her fight all those boys she has in her house :)
3. After 6 months of tears and awfulness, Laura left her job. Laura is now bored and broke, but it's a vast improvement.
4. Josh officially decided to go to law school, starting at Cooley in January '07. He bought LSAT prep books and a stopwatch and is one determined boy!
5. Laura lined up school counseling internships for the fall at Explorer Elementary in Kentwood and Godfrey-Lee Middle/High School in Wyoming. Commencement is 12/16/06. Let us know if you want dibs on a ticket :)
6. Josh went to bed BEFORE Laura tonight. Say it with me, kids...MONUMENTAL! :)

We bought a tent and are going camping at Grand Haven in August. That place is crazy booked up. Dunno how we got the two-day spot that we did. We're pretty geeked to fire up the air mattress (thanks Ryan and Denise!) and get back to...nature? Sounds funny when said campground is visible from the road and consists mainly of concrete and sand. In the words of Will Ferrell quoting Robert Goulet..."That's why I come up here. NAAAAATURE! Goulet."

I hope to soon learn fun tricks so that I can use HTML and post links. I'm working on it. My goal is to have a blog rivaling Preggy Kate's. (I'd link you to her blog but I'm helpless. Kate, since we're both housewives these days, how about you show me how to do it?)

Peace out, girl scout.

Stuff!

2006-02-04T15:14:00.000-05:00

A draft I found written 2/4/06...

One of the upsides to getting married? Being able to walk into your kitchen, clean and well-equipped with nice stuff. The feeling that you don't HAVE to have the microwave that you got for $5 at a garage sale if you don't want to. Being able to throw away the 50-cent spatulas you got at IKEA because they melted. Having a 10-button digital timer that you can JUST PUNCH THE TIME INTO instead of scrolling through a possible 90 minutes of cooking to get the time you need. Right now I'm making some brownies. I got to use a sweet mixing bowl, the nicest cake pan I've ever used before, and as I open my cupboards for things I am greeted by all sorts of things that are nicely coordinated - pasta bowls. Measuring cups. An oven mitt.

I just love it. This is a reflection of my own creative sensibilities, and I am so happy with the results. Maybe this is coming off as materialistic - I hope not. It's just so nice to MAKE a home according to your own preferences (and not the limitations of the selection at the dollar store or IKEA...though don't get me wrong, I love them both!), and to have a bunch of people rallying around you wanting to help you with that. To help you make your own comfortable little corner of the world. Now I want to go make some cheesecakes just so that I can use my springform pans. Mmmm, delicious. If you want some dessert, you might have luck just stopping over here, because Laura's inspired!

Now, if only I could figure out where my trifle bowl was...

An introduction

2006-02-02T23:22:00.000-05:00

I came across this picture of my cousin Ariel, taken at my mom's birthday party this summer. Ariel, though only seven, is quite the diva. She'll make a sassy junior bridesmaid, if I do say so myself.

Rock on with your bad self, Ariel. Rock on.

Nerd Alert!

2006-02-02T20:42:00.000-05:00

Today, after meeting with Pastor Joe (anyone remember the "Ranger Joe" song from Full House? I used to sing this song in my head when I was a young 'un:

Pastor Joe

He's the greatest guy I know

Pastor Joe

...but anyway, after meeting with Pastor Joe, Josh and I were in the drive thru at Taco Bell getting ourselves a snack (for where else would one GO for a snack?) and he was begging, BEGGING me to let him spend twenty two dollars on this book pictured at left. Because he is a Star Wars geek. (But let's face it, I am too.) Prior to this incident, he had spent hours over the course of the past two days reading this book in the Barnes and Noble cafe and had only 75 pages left to read. The boy was desperate. Foaming at the mouth a little, even. Persistence paid off. I let him get the book when we stopped at the mall to drop off my rings so that they can be soldered together (*sniff*).

************************************************************************************

Fast forward to an hour later. This boy happily retreated to his own personal porcelain throne to begin the glorious conclusion of the book. He eventually came back out to our new monster-sized armchair (think Sulley, only not bubblegum blue) to finish. He made a comment about it being a really pivotal, suspenseful part of the book.

Me: So does that mean that you don't want me talking to you right now?

Josh: Yes.

Me: Really?

Josh: Yes.

Me: Are you sure?

Josh: Yes.

Me: Can I show you some flowers?

Josh recognized the humor in this despite the fact that I was driving him nuts. On purpose. What a great marriage we're going to have.

Josh's quote of the week: "Come on, Alpine Climber!" (This was said to me when I was trying to get out of the car at church on Sunday. He had parked with the passenger side up against a grassy incline.)

Do you want to come to our wedding?

2005-12-31T10:25:00.000-05:00

See, this method seems so much easier. In the age of socially acceptable mass e-mails, I am trying to understand why I have spent the better part of the last 60 hours addressing envelopes, hand-feeding card stock into my printer for inserts, and stuffing/stamping/licking said envelopes.

The guest list is another fine point in this adventure. I told Josh we should just concede and invite the entire Eastern Bloc. And maybe Bangladesh. (It should be noted that I made the Bangladesh suggestion under my breath while he was on the phone with his aunt, gathering addresses (and, consequently, more "must-invite" names). Following this comment I threw a kitchen sponge at the counter.)

The invitation process isn't all bad, though. Mom, Grandma, Anne, and Marnee came over to help, bless their hearts. I have even made some new friends in the process:

My Aunt Candy got me this great little book for Christmas -
The Nearlywed Handbook: How to Survive the Happiest Day of Your Life by Dan Zevin. Now, there's lots of practical advice in this book, none of which is to be taken seriously, as it is written by a stand-up comic. Josh and Anne thought it was real advice and I'm still not sure they believe me when I say it's all just a big joke. Anyway, here is what Dan says about registering for gifts:
Typical Bride Response to Registering - "Matching dishes. We're definitely signing up for those cool blue plates from Crate & Barrel. And Polo bedsheets. Do you have any idea how sick I am of sleeping on that Holly Hobby pillowcase I've had since I used to wear a retainer? We're going to be married people! We're going to get a set of forks that don't have the ValuJet logo on them! And champagne glasses. Don't you love those tulip ones in the Domestications catalog? Hey, I just remembered! Williams Sonoma has that awesome KitchenAid Mixer-Master thing I've been wanting. Hmmm, I wonder what you do with one of those things..."
Typical Groom Response to Registering - "Home Depot is open till ten o'clock on Thursday nights."
Typical Couple Response to Registering - Most Nearly-weds resolve to register together at a mutually agreed-upon store, such as any store of the bride's choosing. This helps the groom learn his place in the wedding-planning process right off the bat.

Oh, between this book and watching "My Big Fat Greek Wedding", I've managed to stay somewhat sane :)

Happy New Year!

Reality sets in

2005-11-22T22:30:00.000-05:00

I'm leaving my job. Tomorrow's my last day. It finally seems real to me! I had a lovely going away lunch at work today with scrumptious Cottage Inn pizza and was bestowed with a card filled with lovely writings. My favorite was Marnee's (mostly inside jokes but I'm hoping you can find some humor in it anyway):

Top 10 things to help you be successful at your new job:

10. If you are transporting clients, you better get some barf bags for your car
9. When people arrive to the office after you, don't forget to welcome them to their job
8. Find out who has the pregnancy chair and don't sit in it!
7. Call up Felix to get your Ybarra fix
6. Always have a plan
5. Don't neglect the record
4. Never, under any circumstances, make any jokes about quadriplegics
3. Wait at least 30 days before telling anyone your nicknames
2. Be on time, especially your first day!
1. Don't forget those you "Left Behind" here in Kalamazoo!

Brings back so many memories...like the time when I got to work and Marnee greeted me in the parking lot, throwing her arms wide and proclaiming, "Welcome! Welcome to your job!" And Marnee's insatiable need to always have a plan, no matter what's going on. ("Soooo...what's the plan?") And my constant references to the "record" that I seem to be keeping on myself ("For the record...") And of course, the reference to the fact that I was quite late on my first day of work because my alarm hadn't gone off. Apparently it was so painful a memory that I forgot all about it. Honestly, I'm still not sure I believe that it happened! Then there was our temporary obsession with the Left Behind books, the fact that one of my nicknames is Pork (don't ask), and my favorite foster care worker, John Ybarra, who used to hound me about having his brother Felix put decals on my sweet black Grand Am I used to have. Good times...Marnee always knows how to sum things up. I'm going to miss these people.

Below is my stapler, which I am very grieved to part with. Just call me Milton.

Dent

2005-11-20T17:53:00.000-05:00

I have discovered that my engagement ring has created a dent in my finger. I've become one of those people, like my mom, who has worn a ring long enough to have a dent in my finger. ("Those" people? Are we really our own category?)

I have also discovered that my diamond looks best under dim lighting.

Happy 89th, Grandma!

The many results of eating less...

2005-11-13T16:44:00.000-05:00

This is a photo of a two-pound catfish. I lost the equivalent of this fish in body fat this past week. I accept your congratulations and well-wishes for further fishes lost. Perhaps next week...a mackerel.

Today I cleaned out my fridge, as three things had come to my attention: 1) There was no room in the fridge; 2) Despite this, there was nothing to eat; 3) All my tupperware had gone missing, and I had suspicions as to its whereabouts.

What did I find? The two nearly-empty half gallons of milk that I was recitant to open. The penne. The whole-wheat spaghetti. The barbeque meatballs. The chicken marinade. And finally...the shredded lettuce. For those of you who are conducting highly complex biological experiments requiring specific variables, it was shredded iceberg contained in a navy blue IKEA Syntes cereal bowl with an elastic-edged Saran Ready-Wrap thing. It had been in my refrigerator for approximately...well...it dates back to pre-engagement Laura's house, so let's say approximately four and a half weeks.

I am a disgusting human being.

Please excuse me while I scavenge through my non-perishable food items for something to eat.

And also...

2005-11-10T15:24:00.000-05:00

http://dictionary.reference.com/search?q=flat%20as%20a%20pancake

Junk food aisle explosion!

2005-11-10T15:11:00.000-05:00

For the month leading up to my birthday, I swore off many wonderful things, all of which can be found atop this cake. Marnee is the ultimate diet saboteur, and I love her for it.

Yoke

2005-09-25T15:50:00.000-04:00

With my job, I have to help people who are going through tough stuff. That's what I'm paid for. Most of the time I do a pretty good job of dealing with it during the work hours and not letting it consume me. Every now and then, though, I go through these cycles where I feel compelled to solve everyone's problems for them. Not just at work, either. Between my 40-hour-per-week job, my 10-hour-per-week counseling practicum, my family, and my friends, it seems everyone's facing some kind of crisis. Well, okay, that was a blanket statement - not everybody. But a lot of people. And a lot of the crises are very serious. And I take on the yoke of pushing up my sleeves and trying to solve the problem single-handedly.

Now, the problem is not so much that I want to help. I should want to help. I'd be a little worried about myself if my attitude was one of, "No way, that's your problem, get out of my comfort zone. I don't want this to get in the way of me camping out on my couch and watching Desperate Housewives." (For the record, I don't watch Desperate Housewives. Nor do I have a couch - not a real one anyway. It's just a hyperbolic example. Work with me, people. It's all about imagery and exaggerating the absurd!) The problem is that I've lost my sense of balance between the two. These crises are not mine...the electric shutoff notice. The cancer. The broken arm. The abusive relationship. The destroyed home and missing relatives. The burnout of my coworkers. The elderly killed in the bus fire. The blown transmission. They belong to the people they are happening to. Most of the time, I cannot solve them. I don't have the capacity to fix the entire problem. And being a benevolent control freak, this is sometimes a reality I don't want to face.

What can I do? I can pray. I can ask God to help me serve these people. I can call periodically to show people I care. I can pick up a prescription, accompany someone to a scary doctor's appointment, cover a home visit for the coworker with car trouble...I can do little things...under normal circumstances. Lately, though, it seems like even the little things are hard to do with the many other demands I have on my time, energy, and sanity. I am frustrated because I cannot help as much as I want to, cannot do even the little things that I normally would be able to do. Heck, I can't even meet the demands of my own life. I can't seem to make up the time at work that I'm having to miss for my practicum. I have to be VERY careful with my money right now if I want to get my own bills paid. I have to take care of myself so that I'm strong enough and present enough to be useful to those around me. And I don't think that's selfish. When I was a lifeguard, we were taught that we should never attempt a rescue if we were somehow disabled or there was some kind of threat to our safety. For example, if I saw someone face-down in the water, and there was a downed power line also in the water, would it be smart of me to try to rescue that person? Of course not, because then I'd become electrocuted and there would just be two people to save.

That's kind of how I'm feeling right now. I feel disabled in the helping department, and I need to resolve that before I can help anyone else too much. Maybe right now is my time to feel okay about depending upon others, even though there is so much strife in the world around me. I hate, HATE that thought, but I have to come to terms with it.